Apparently, I didn't create my new blog a moment too soon

My post about Jessica Simpson from earlier today was "tweeted" on a Twitter feed (I think that's the correct vernacular) called "sexycurvybabes."

I'd be in a better humor about this, were it not for the fact that by my rough estimate, 50% of the other tweets to the feed are things like (and for once I'm going to "censor" myself simply because I don't want to pick up certain kinds of traffic):

H()rnv blond fvck!ng outdoors: K!nkv chick fvck!ng really hard in all her holes

Being Catholic, on the other hand...

A preliminary report commissioned by the nation's Roman Catholic bishops to investigate the clergy sex abuse scandal has found no evidence that gay priests are more likely than heterosexual clergy to molest children, the lead authors of the study said Tuesday.

The fault, Dear Catholics, lies not in your stars...

The question has been raised repeatedly within and outside the church because the overwhelming majority of known victims were boys. As part of the church's response to the crisis, the Vatican ordered a review of all U.S. seminaries that, among other issues, looked for any "evidence of homosexuality" in the schools.

"What we are suggesting is that the idea of sexual identity be separated from the problem of sexual abuse," said Margaret Smith of John Jay College, in a speech to the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops. "At this point, we do not find a connection between homosexual identity and the increased likelihood of subsequent abuse from the data that we have right now."

But don't worry, any Catholics who may be looking in. Your church is still homophobic and generally sex-negative.

In a separate move on Tuesday, the bishops adopted a pastoral letter affirming the church's definition of marriage being between one man and one woman, and that sex is meant for procreation.

Capturing the exact precise instant Jessica Simpson realized her career was over

I suppose I could feel sorry for her, but when you can't really do anything but be curvy with big boobs and take most of your clothes off...

It'll never happen.

Too many slapfights about who gets to be called "Butch."

You won't often see me saying nice things about Jessica Biel.

I mean, she may be very sweet, and the nice ass and everything, but I generally think she's kind of a bimbo. However, especially in this day and age, I like any Hollywood starlet who realizes a baby isn't just an accessory.

Somebody tell Blogger

"When it comes to the flow of information, I think that the more freely information flows, the stronger the society becomes, because then citizens of countries around the world can call their own government to account," Obama said.

Teenaged hillbillys say some stupid things sometimes

Case in point.

Just goes to show ya.

I truly didn't think it was possible anymore for the Republicans to do anything that would leave me literally open-mouthed with surprise. From Julie Gulden on Daily Kos:

30 Republicans voted against Senator Al Franken's amendment that would stop the Department of Defense from contracting with companies that require employees to resolve workplace complaints through private arbitration rather than the courts. This includes complaints of sexual assault.

Franken's amendment will be used during the coming campaign year. Women from coast to coast will be asking their Replublican Congress Critter, "What the Hell were you thinking of?"

But because of one of his first pieces of legislation, Democrats now have their most brazen attack line of the emerging 2010 campaign season: that Republicans are insensitive to rape victims.

Privately, GOP sources acknowledge that they failed to anticipate the political consequences of a "no" vote on the amendment. And several aides said that Republicans are engaged in an internal blame game about why they agreed to a roll-call vote on the measure, rather than a simple voice vote that would have allowed the opposing senators to duck criticism.

They failed to anticipate the political consequences of voting no on a woman's right to bring her rapist to trial. Wow. That's all. Just...wow.

See if you can tell at what point I stopped taking this article seriously

Yes, it's time for the annual "Are there too many gay stereotypes on TV?" articles.

Over time, the image of gay people on TV became less lavender and more gray—as multifaceted as the five men on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy or the ladies of The L Word.

We expected better of you, Mr. President

Don't ask me why, in retrospect.

It's always nice to see a Democratic White House with a majority abandon the rights of half the country for a pyrrhic victory.

Yes, they did.

Is it possible that Carrie Prejean has been punking us all along?

You remember Ms. Prejean. She's the embarrassment to my home state whose attempts to convince us that she's actually a Catholic nun were stymied by the revelation that she'd taped herself riding to Bethlehem on her own ass. Or something like that.

The other day she threatened to walk out on Larry King because he asked her a perfectly legitimate question. Personally, I was hoping Larry's reaction would be "Bitch, please. I've interviewed Presidents and foreign heads of state. And you think that you walking off my show will leave me to stammer and fumfuh?"

But now I've begun to wonder whether or not she can possibly be serious. Because:

No, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting breast implants as a Christian. I think it’s a personal decision. I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where it says you shouldn’t get breast implants.

She has got to be kidding me!

We'll have a gay old time

The soft n' smart Blue Gal found a photograph from a 1966 advertisement that made me laugh out loud:


Reminds me of a track from one of Bill Cosby's albums. He has a toothache and, for lack of anything else, accepts a Midol tablet from his landlady.

Much to his shame, "...the pain went away. And I tried to make the pain come. Nothing! Midol did it. Good ole' Midol. And you women don't tell anybody about it. Keep all the goodies to yourself..."

Lucky I didn't shoot him after all, then

Burger King happens to be the fast food that is closest to my heart (and is no doubt blocking my arteries, but that's another post). At least twice in the past month, I have gone to one of the branches here in Seattle only to be told that because of the one dollar double cheeseburger promotion they'd been having, they were out of burgers. At Burger King.

This was annoying, but not overly stressful. Believe it or not, we actually have more than one branch around. So I went to another and didn't think too much about it.

Turns out, though, I'm not the only one to have been inconvenienced by this promotion. Most of the Burger King Franchisees are mad. And they're not just mad, they're suing mad!

Burger King franchisees sued the hamburger company this week over its $1 double cheeseburger promotion, saying they're losing money on the deal and the company can't set maximum menu prices.

What a senseless waste of human life.

An actor? No. A writer...

Entertainment Weekly asks if readers have ever felt "betrayed" by an actor (and their choice of role). I don't think I have. Because even the most brilliant actor can only go where the story takes them; they're usually not in control of that (and usually shouldn't be).

For example, that movie with Kevin Kline as Cole Porter sucked, but that wasn't his fault.

I may sometimes have felt saddened to learn that an actor whose work I enjoy believes some things that I think are really fucking stupid, but betrayed? No.

I didn't even feel betrayed by the Tennessee cast of The Girl in the Boat. True, some of them acted liked divas, but...they're actors. The director is another story. And not just a director of my work.

(Although some directors--Brian De Palma--can't betray me because I'll never trust them)

Natalie Portman is annoying, but George Lucas betrayed me with (most of) the Star Wars prequels, she didn't.

Writers is another story. There I think I could say I've felt betrayed, most especially in television.

I've felt betrayed by the Buffy and Angel writers, as I came to believe that for all their nice talk about feminism, they had no idea how to write a strong woman out of the series without killing her. And because of their insensitive handling of fans who were truly upset at the loss of one of those women.

The later, post-Sorkin seasons of The West Wing might've seemed like a betrayal, but that's why I stopped watching after he left.

Last year's season finale of Bones felt like a betrayal (actually, if felt like an hour-long "Fuck you!" to fans); again, that's why I stopped watching.

Jersey Girl and Clerks II are betrayals, not just of me as an audience member but of the promise of Kevin Smith's talent.

Speaking of things that have to be stopped

Four words: Jon...Gosselin...sex tape!

As sure as the sun rises every morning...

Richard Floyd, a member of the...oh yes, come to papa...Tennessee House of Representatives, sez:

"Not all Muslims are terrorists, but so far all terrorists are Muslim."

And oh yes, there's more.

A new venue III (A new new venue)

I've finally accepted that Dancing Girls is closed until further notice. So, I have created a new blog to take its place. The new blog is called She Makes Me Quiver. I'm still "moving in," but I have a couple of posts up already, including one that explains the title of this new place...

Saved by sudden sanity at the supreme second

Oh. My. God.

A 17-year-old, openly gay girl in Alabama was told that she could not go to prom with her girlfriend. I wish I could say that surprises me, but it doesn't. What does surprise me is what happened when the ACLU stood up for the civil rights of the young woman:

Rather than treating their students like oh, what is the phrase, actual human beings, the school actually tried to cancel the entire prom.

Dig it, that's how powerful is the hold ignorance and bigotry has on this school and/or its principal. They were willing to ruin the night for an entire class before they'd let two girls attend a dance together.

Happily, cooler heads seem to have prevailed. The latest word is that the prom will go forward, and the lesbian couple will be "allowed."

"Allowed." How generous.

I reiterate: Robert. Zemeckis. Has. Got to be. Stopped!

It was bad enough that he seems to have been sucked so deep into the Uncanny Valley (look it up) that he's confused it with real animation (you know, what Pixar and Brad Bird do).

At least when Zemeckis made Roger Rabbit, he had the rare good sense to hire the incredibly gifted Richard Williams to do the animated parts of the film. You'd think that would've taught him an important lesson, but apparently not.

Only too recently, we learned he's going to fuck up Yellow Submarine for future generations. Now it comes out, not only is he also planning a Roger Rabbit sequel, but he wants to do it using his creepy, not-real-animation for the humans in the story.

Taking a cue from South Park: Why doesn't Zemeckis just film himself raping Roger Rabbit for 104 minutes; call it a movie, and leave it at that?

Women Demi Moore's own age, or, What's wrong...

...with these pictures?

These are direct contemporaries of Ms. Moore, who are mostly all at least somewhat still in the public eye. BTW, the point here is not to suggest that any of these women look bad, quite the contrary.

But to ask: Why do you suppose Moore looks like she could be any of their daughters?

Meg Ryan

Gina Gershon

Paula Abdul

Michelle Yeoh

Tracy Thorn

Lisa Whelchel

Helen Hunt

Lisa Kudrow

Tori Amos