The orgasm festival is going to take place on the campus of UNC-Chapel Hill on Thursday, November 10th. There are going to be "pin the finger on the clitoris" and “locate the g-spot” games followed by contests to see how quickly and properly people of both sexes can put condoms on bananas.
Believe it or not, "Dr" Mike "Hoo-hoo dilly" Adams--he of the charming "republican girls are better-looking than Democratic girls" theory--is rather irritated by this. He writes:
Jessica Polka, an executive board member for the co-sponsor of the event, was recently quoted as saying that “We also have the goal of trying to work toward fighting the social stigma against female sexuality.” In other words, she wants college women to become whores without being ostracized.
Yes, because only a whore enjoys a good orgasm, having their clitoris fingered, or g-spot located. Or cares enough about their health to want to know how to put on a condom quickly and properly.
While the UNC administration is undoubtedly thrilled that these coeds are turning out to be nymphomaniacs rather than intellectuals, not all of the blame can be placed on UNC.
Yes, because if a woman expresses (or probably even experiences) sexual desire, she is automatically an irrational nymphomaniac.
Indeed, FSU may have gotten the idea for their “orgasm festival” from the University of California, San Diego.
It's times like this I'm really glad I was born in California, and not North Carolina, Ohio or Tennessee.
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