Saturday, June 02, 2007

Random Confessions Of The '80s Man

If you were around the intersection of Greenlake, 50th and Stone in Seattle a few minutes ago, that fella you saw dancing his ass off to this (inasmuch as you can in a car)...was me.

All I can say in my defense is, when you're an up-tempo dance fan, you're an up-tempo dance fan all the way...

ant-reason for sex-people, sex-reason for ant-people

A fella has taken exception to my argument that video games connot be, are never going to be, art. In doing so he made a typo that I found funny. Especially considering what his given name is. I considered just mocking him for it, but you know, clearly this subject is important to him.

So important he either didn't notice or didn't care that I stopped talking about this over a year ago. Now, we might infer something from this about what video games do to your sense of timing...

...but, I feel that anyone who cares this much about something deserves to have their comment treated seriously, which I have done over at the original post.

To have their comment treated seriously...and then mocked for their typos.

Either Battlestar Galactica is a self-correcting system, or I am

Good afternoon. I found a picture of a model/actress named Tricia Helfer earlier today.

Not that picture, but it gives you an idea. I was going to do a jokey post here about how maybe there was, after all, some lingering threat of my ever watching the new Battlestar Galactica, in which Ms. Helfer is a member of the cast.

A hot and seductive looking babe is a hot and seductive looking babe. I'm not too proud.

However, in doing a little Yahoo! searching just now to make sure I had my information correct, I was confronted with the most closed-system websites I have ever seen for any sci-fi show, and reminded of why I haven't been able to get into this fan-acclaimed series.

As some of you know, I have been unable to for many reasons. Perhaps foremost among them that the whole thing seems to me to have such an air of self-importance. Like: This is serious science fiction. Ooh!

The fan websites are worse.

And looking at a clip on YouTube reminded me of the second reason: The dialogue is ennobled by the word "functional."

I'm outta here. No hot and seductive looking babe is worth that.

(You have to draw the line somewhere, you know)

Hah! See, I told you.

Compared to most bloggers, I'm a friggin' superhero.

I am nerdier than 16% of all people. Are you a nerd? Click here to find out!


You are Dark Chocolate

You live your life with intensity, always going full force.
You push yourself (and others) to the limit... you want more than you can handle.
An extreme person, you challenge and inspire the world!

Not my favorite, really. I'd rather be a good old-fashioned Hershey bar with almonds.

(It's listed on Amazon as a "Gourmet Food," you know)

Well, I should hope not...

You Are 0% Homophobic

You're open minded, tolerant, and accepting.
And you're not homophobic in the least :-)

You told me something wrong, I know I listen too long

First, I took this quiz.

You Would Be a Pet Fish

Relaxed and laid back, you prefer to sit back and observe what's going on around you.
You are secretly very wise and intelligent, but few people take the time to learn about you.
You don't mind if the world doesn't understand you. You're having enough fun trying to understand the world.

Why you would make a great pet: You're peaceful and nice to be around, but not very demanding

Why you would make a bad pet: Let's face it... the only person you're truly interesting to is yourself

What you would love about being a fish: Swimming around aimlessly without a care in the world

What you would hate about being a fish: Being used as bait or food for bigger fish

Which led to the question, if I were a fish, what kind of fish would I be? Well when I think of fish, I think of Finding Nemo, the biggest fish movie of all time (bigger than Jaws!). Soooooooo...

Bruce- "Good on ya, mate!"


Squirt- "Sweet!"


Bubbles- "My bubbles....."


Dori- "just keep swimming..."


Nemo- "No Dad, I can do it!"


Crush- "Later dude!"


Marlin- "I'm looking for my son Nemo..."


Darla- "Parahna, dey in da Amazon!"


Which Finding Nemo character are you?
created with

Well. Being Bruce certainly makes my nephew giggle when I say "Fish are friends, not food!" like in the movie. But he's not really a pet fish, is he? Same with Squirt. To get to a real pet fish, we have to go with Bubbles the yellow tang.

That's right. a yellow tang.

The first one who says they always knew that gets bopped right in the nose.

Two images; two questions.

Selected for what, that's what I'd like to know...

Why don't I own this poster and have it on my wall?

Friday, June 01, 2007

Well, that's just great

21%Mingle2 - Free Online Dating

Then again, I've sat in a room with George Lucas/Star Wars fans. I can take anything.

The horror, the horror.

Now, you may like "Nightmare Before Christmas."

Although you might wonder, like me, how a film he neither directed nor wrote the screenplay for became known as "Tim Burton's Nightmare Before Christmas." You may like it nevertheless. But ask yourself. Wouldn't it have been better if The Beatles had written the music instead of Danny Elfman, who never should have left Oingo Boingo behind?

just like the rain i'll be always falling, only to rise and fall again

This is one of those songs which always amazes me how it's come to have a reputation as just a great ballad. I guess its use in a good movie during a scene wherein the heroine finally gets the boy of her dreams has deafened people to the reality of it.

But if you ever really listen to the's actually kind of depressing. Despite (or possibly because of) that, it still means a lot to me. Here's Thompson Twins - If You Were Here (Live).

Thursday, May 31, 2007

God, I love YouTube

I was a big fan of Cupid, the show starring Jeremy Piven that Rob Thomas created in 1998. You fans of Thomas's later creation Veronica Mars who want to condemn the CW to hell for stopping the series, hey, at least it got three seasons. Cupid didn't even get 13 episodes on the air.

But, oh, how I loved it, and it is hands down the series that I would most like to see on DVD. Part of me had hoped that with Piven winning awards, and Thomas the creator of a cult success, whoever owns the rights might see that there's some easy profit to be had.

So far, nada. However, I learned today, quite by accident, that someone started posting the episodes to YouTube. You can find them by searching for "cupid tv show." To give you a little taste, here's the last 10 minutes (more or less) of what may be my favorite episode, "Pick-Up Schticks."

I say "may be" because Cupid is one of those series, for me, where immidiately I think of a favorite episode I think of another. But I think this would have to at least be in my top 3.

By the way I'm assuming that you, like most of the world, missed the series, so you should probably read a couple of things first. Don't worry, they're short. There's a good summary of the premise at the imdb page. And here's a synopsis of the plot of this particular episode from Wikipedia.

Okay, here's the clip. Afterwards I'll be back to say a little something about why I think this is my favorite episode, but please watch the clip first if you're gonna.

By design, Thomas and his collaborators answered the question of whether or not their hero was really Cupid, as he believed, by a series of "maybe not...but maybe" sequences. But as I remember it, for the first handful of episodes they were really playing up the witty, intelligent and romantic aspects of the series and Trevor Hale.

And it was wonderful. But in this episode it becomes clear that if he is not Cupid...then he's really, really disturbed. And I don't mean that in a cheap, "You'd have to be disturbed to turn down a chance to have sex with Sherilyn Fenn" way.

IMO, you can count on the fingers of one hand the series that have encompassed poetry, wit and romance. While at the same time not being afraid to be unamusing sometimes, and not being dainty in the construction of the characters but giving them texture and quality.

And you'd probably have more than a few fingers left over after you'd named Cupid.

Special edition DVDs I'm really looking forward to viewing


Because some things matter and what if they didn't?

(Go to hell, Mellencamp)

Wheel of Fortune

Holy crap

This is turning out to be a good couple of days for discovering heretofore unknown things via movies and television.

Along with Science of Sleep, I rented a Fractured Fairy Tales Best Of DVD yesterday.

God bless my video store and their "Wednesday two for ones." So I'm watching their version of "Rumpelstiltskin," and we get to the part where the young queen starts trying to guess the name of the little man.

She tries dozens of names---"Alfred? Barnaby? Clyde? Zeke?"--- And smack dab in the middle there:

"Lowry? Sam?"

Now, as any film or especially Terry Gilliam fan worth the name knows, the hero of his film Brazil is named...Sam Lowry. And here are those names put together some 25 years before that film was released.

Coincidence? Yeah, probably. At least, I've seen or read everything on Gilliam that I can and I don't remember ever seeing that the name was meant as a nod.

Nevertheless...holy crap.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007


I've always kind of idly wondered about the name of Bad Hat Harry Productions, the company started by director/producer Bryan Singer that produces House on TV as well as his movies including The Usual Suspects and first two X-Men films.

But I was just idly interested, never enough to actually look it up on Yahoo! or somethin'.

So I'm watching Jaws on TV just now. It's one of my favorite films, a reminder that top box office doesn't always mean unwatchable for anyone with a critical mind. But I had completely forgotten the scene from which Singer's company takes its name.

It's true, you really do learn something new every day. Now that I know of course, I can see that the title card for the company is a tip of the (bad) hat to the scene in question.

Okay, so sometimes I'm slow.

So you want to see Kristen Bell wearing a bikini

We of Dictionopolis in Digitopolis are not here to judge.

beauty sleep

I think I'm glad I'm not in film school right now because I dread the thought of how many pretentious, boring student films Science of Sleep must have inspired. Which not to say that it is pretentious or boring, quite the contrary. It is pretentious and captivating.

It's just that it's got to be the most "indy" (in a good way) film I've ever seen, and that can be as bad as good in the effect that it has.

The movie, like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind from the same director, could be, maybe should be, confusing. But Michel Gondry is the kind of director who gives "visionary" a good name.

He can give us scrumptious images that are hard to resist. Here. Assuming you haven't seen the film, watch the trailer. It probably speaks for the charm of this movie better than most of my words ever could. And you won't hear me admit that often.

But Gondry can also (wait for it) tell a story. Based on this and ...Spotless they're not "normal" stories, but stories nevertheless. The subject here is dreams, and this movie envisions them more accurately than any film I can remember.

Most tv & movie dream sequences, frankly, are less about that and more about giving writers a chance to play "what if" while holding a get out of jail free card. But the dreams in ...Sleep are actually dreams the way I, at least, experience them. Sometimes.

PS: I also suspect I should be thanking this film, for "introducing" me to the French actress Charlotte Gainsbourg...

Just another of my book reviews

This one of the obvious High School Movie in training, I Love You, Beth Cooper.

I always suspected as much, frankly.

A veteran producer for NBC's Dateline has claimed that she was fired by the network after complaining to top NBC News execs that the "To Catch a Predator" series violated not only the news division's ethical principles but standards of responsible journalism in general. Marsha Bartel, who said in a $1-million lawsuit against the network that she had worked for NBC News for 21 years, claimed that after she was appointed as producer of the highly rated series on Internet predators, she quickly realized that she would have little supervision over the operations of the group Perverted Justice, which the show's executives had hired to lure adults to a house, fitted out with hidden TV cameras. The marks, who expected to meet teenagers for sex, instead found themselves confronted by Dateline reporter Chris Hansen, followed by a squad of police officers. Bartel said she complained to her superiors that Perverted Justice refused to provide complete transcripts of the conversations between their teenage-posing decoys and the targets but later learned that they "sometimes beg individuals to come to the sting locations even after the targets of the sting initially decide not to come."

There's more if you can take it. Now as one or two of you know, I'm pretty zero-tolerance when it comes to perverted adults who have sex with children. I guess most people are pretty low-tolerance about that.

But, there's always been something that's bothered me about the "perverts on the internet" scare that we've had over the past few years in general, and this Dateline show in specific. I admit I don't have chapter and verse on this.

But some combination of common sense and gut feeling has always made me think it doesn't happen as much as some seem to want us to believe. And when it does happen more often than not it's entrapment, as it seems to be in this case, if the producer is correct.

But the idea that at most if not all of the networks, "ethical principles [and] standards of responsible journalism" come second to entertainment value is hardly telling most of us anything.

Quite frankly, that's why most of us read the internet and/or watch Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert.

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Without condescension how I tried to write my latest review, of A Model Summer, the debut novel by actress/model Paulina Porizkova. It's too easy for casual readers and professional critics alike to fall into the trap of saying things like..."And she can write, too," but, she can.

For what it's worth, even when she was at the height of her fame in the late '80s/early '90s,

Porizkova was never the girl I most wanted to get close to, so don't think this is me speaking up for some dreamgirl past. If it was by Penelope Ann Miller or even Madonna, both of whom made much deeper impressions on my heart back in the day, maybe.

But I don't know if Miller could write a book this good, and I'm sure Madonna couldn't.

Looks-wise, I actually think Porizkova is one of those lucky women who proves the truth of something Ellen Barkin is quoted as saying in the new EW:

"I always thought women peaked between 36 and 43. Something happens to your face and everything just settles in."

I'm going to be a gentleman and not give her exact age, but Porizkova is in that range. This is her a few years ago:

She looks much better to me there than she did in the above picture. But again-none of that has much to do with how I enjoyed the book or not.

Monday, May 28, 2007

Daydream In Blue

Daydream, I fell asleep amid the flowers, for a couple of hours, on a beautiful day.

Daydream, I dream of you amid the flowers, for a couple of hours, such a beautiful day.

Daydream, I fell asleep amid the flowers, for a couple of hours, on a beautiful day.

Daydream, I dream of you amid the flowers, for a couple of hours, such a beautiful day.

I daydream
I daydream
I daydream

Words by The Wallace Collection, as sampled by I Monster. Images of Ms. Jovovich.

Random glimpse into the divine

Well, isn't that spiffy

Wash. - Vandals burned dozens of small American flags that decorated veterans' graves for Memorial Day and replaced many of them with hand-drawn swastikas, authorities said Monday.

Forty-six flag standards were found empty and another 33 flags were in charred tatters Sunday in the cemetery, authorities said. Swastikas drawn on paper appeared where 14 of the flags had been.

Members of the American Legion on this island off Washington's northwest coast replaced the burned flags with new ones Sunday afternoon.

"This is not an act of free speech. This is a crime," Sheriff Bill Cumming said in a statement released Monday afternoon.

What's odd to me is that anybody felt the need to make that statement. As though any reasonable person was ever going to argue that the descecration of soldiers' graves were an act of free speech.

But then, you know how we Commies can get.

Looking through the Rear Window at you, or, As comes as no surprise to anybody, I'm happier about my score as a dame than as a leading man

Or, Just call me The African Queen.

Or, On the whole, I'd rather be in The Philadelphia Story.

Your Score: Jimmy Stewart

You scored 9% Tough, 19% Roguish, 42% Friendly, and 28% Charming!

You are the fun and friendly boy next door, the classic nice guy who still manages to get the girl most of the time. You're every nice girl's dreamboat, open and kind, nutty and charming, even a little mischievous at times, but always a real stand up guy. You're dependable and forthright, and women are drawn to your reliability, even as they're dazzled by your sense of adventure and fun. You try to be tough when you need to be, and will gladly stand up for any damsel in distress, but you'd rather catch a girl with a little bit of flair. Your leading ladies include Jean Arthur and Donna Reed, those sweet girl-next-door types.

Find out what kind of classic dame you'd make by taking the Classic Dames Test.

Link: The Classic Leading Man Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Your Score: Katharine Hepburn

You scored 26% grit, 33% wit, 42% flair, and 9% class!

You are the fabulously quirky and independent woman of character. You go your own way, follow your own drummer, take your own lead. You stand head and shoulders next to your partner, but you are perfectly willing and able to stand alone. Others might be more classically beautiful or conventionally woman-like, but you possess a more fundamental common sense and off-kilter charm, making interesting men fall at your feet. You can pick them up or leave them there as you see fit. You share the screen with the likes of Spencer Tracy and Cary Grant, thinking men who like strong women.

Find out what kind of classic leading man you'd make by taking the The Classic Dames Test written by gidgetgoes on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test

Photos as implication of hypocrisy

American actress Sarah Jessica Parker
has hit out at young stars who behave 'poorly' to get undue attention.

The former 'Sex And The City' actress revealed that she becomes very 'distressed' when she sees the sensationalism created by the conduct of the young generation of actors.

"I am very distressed by the sensationalism of everything... People are getting attention
for doing nothing, for behaving poorly, for abusing themselves in public and being abused, exploiting themselves," Contactmusic quoted Parker, as saying.

The 42-year-old revealed that she finds this mannerism very 'vulgar'.

"I find it vulgar and I find it awful," she said.

What can I say about Charles Nelson Reilly...

...that this doesn't say for me?

I used to think he was funny on those old Match Game reruns. But I later learned that the actor, who has died at 76, really had quite a noteworthy career quite apart from that. He was in the original Broadway productions of a couple of classic musicals, "How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying" and "Hello Dolly," winning a Tony for the latter.

The above-linked story covers his most known work, but I wanted to mention a couple of things that aren't as well known. Reilly gave a wonderful performance as the voice of Mr. Toad in an lighthearted animated TV movie of The Wind in the Willows, made by Rankin and Bass in the 1980s. That version has always seemed underrated to me.

I also remember his appearance a few years ago on an episode of Dinner For Five with (now here's an evening) Dom DeLuise, Burt Reynolds and Charles Durning. One thing he talked about is how modern TV and movie stars don't have as many impressions done of them as did icons from previous eras.

He put this down to their lack of distinctive mannerisms, which in turn he blamed on their lack of stage training. I don't know if he was 100% right, but I don't think he was 100% wrong.

Everybody! Come on, sing! With your mind!

This is an animated short set to the song "I Wanna Be Famous" by singer/songwriter/comedian Jessica Delfino. I found it under featured videos at youtube. She seems to have some reservations about its appearance there, judging from her own blog, but that's where I found it and I like it.

Certainly more than her magical vagina song, playable at the blog, which is a funny idea but a crap song. I love vaginas too much to find this one that boring. Execution counts, people. I can't stress that enough.

(I know a lot of comedians, to say nothing of the success of Seinfeld, make it seem like it doesn't, but it does.)

Random Flickr-blogging 2506: Way, way inside joke edition

Having found this picture, Ben had planned to do some self-indulgent, throwaway riff about how it could almost be a scene from his play, The Girl in the Boat.

Then he was utterly gobsmacked to realize, out of the corner of his eye, that the credited owner of the photo in question is called...Bobby. The name of one of his characters.

Cue Twilight Zone music.

You jackass

KANSAS CITY, Mo. - Tom Wayne has amassed thousands of books in a warehouse during the 10 years he has run his used book store, Prospero's Books.

His collection ranges from best sellers, such as Tom Clancy's "The Hunt for Red October" and Tom Wolfe's "Bonfire of the Vanities," to obscure titles, like a bound report from the Fourth Pan-American Conference held in Buenos Aires in 1910. But when he wanted to thin out the collection, he found he couldn't even give away books to libraries or thrift shops; they said they were full.

So on Sunday, Wayne began burning his books in protest of what he sees as society's diminishing support for the printed word.

I'm sorry, I refuse to believe he couldn't have found anything else to do with his books. To rephrase something Dickens once wrote for a different purpose, are there no poorhouses, etc?

Sunday, May 27, 2007

If there's one thing I can't abide, it's a drama queen.

You Are the Ace of Clubs

You go at everything in your life full force. You are a natural gambler.
Your life definitely has some extreme highs and lows, but you know how to ride out the low times.

A total adventure seeker, you are never satisfied by what's normal or ordinary.
You like to push limits and shock people. You're dramatic, but a drama queen.

Your life has been a wild ride so far. You have stories that people can barely believe.
And you're probably still young... with a lot of wild rides in front of you.

A gamble you should take: High stakes roulette

Your friends would describe you as: Crazy

Your enemies would describe you as: Demented

If you lived in Vegas, you would be: A high roller

All right!

What famous lesbian do you most closely resemble?
Your Result: Katherine Moennig

You're dark, brooding and strangely attractive. You make gay girls and straight girls swoon over you. You are like the coolest person I know, wanna be friends?

Portia Di Rossi
K D Lang
Tammy Lynn Michaels
Jackie Warner
Melissa Ethridge
Ellen Degeneres
Rosie O'Donnell
What famous lesbian do you most closely resemble?
Make a Quiz

I am so gonna get some. Okay, you have to overlook the irony that Moennig is known for her role on the ever-exploitative L Word, but in this context, I'll take it, you know?

No complaints about the rest of the top three, either. Portia De Rossi is v. hot and kd lang has a wonderful voice. Still, I might have expected Ellen DeGeneres to be a little bit higher. But if Mrs. O'Donnell had been any higher than the bottom of the results there'd have been trouble.