Prepare to be utterly creeped out

Via Tapped, we find that John Derbyshire of the conservative National Review's The Corner has been holding forth on just what kind of woman he finds attractive. Mr. Derbyshire?

Conservatives, as I recall, are the ones who believe that "human nature has no history." It follows that we are at ease with the fact that the human female is visually attractive to the human male at, or shortly after, puberty, and for only a few brief years thereafter.

Now, say what you will about Mr. Derbsyshire--and Tapped's Garance Franke-Ruta says,

human puberty in the female of the species begins at around age 9, and continues to roughly age 16, according to the online medical encyclopedia maintained by the National Institutes of Health. Which means the only civilized response to Derbyshire's assertion that pubescent and post-pubescent girls are the "only" attractive female population ought to be a gigantic "Ew."

--but say what you will about him, he is, at least, comitted to his premise. Which is more than you can say for most conservatives. So fixed is his idea that women much past the age of 16 are not fit to be ridden hard or put away wet, he shields his eyes from such godforsaken, bad-looking and offensive examples of their gender as...

Did I buy, or browse, a copy of the November 17 GQ, in order to get a look at Jennifer Aniston's bristols?** No, I didn't. While I have no doubt that Ms. Aniston is a paragon of charm, wit, and intelligence, she is also 36 years old. Even with the strenuous body-hardening exercise routines now compulsory for movie stars, at age 36 the forces of nature have won out over the view-worthiness of the unsupported female bust.

He's right, of course. That's why if Paget Brewster, Teri Polo, or any of the rest of the no-longer-sexy brigade were to do cheerleading routines for me in matching uniforms without their panties, it would have no affect on me. No affect at all. Really. I encourage them to test me.

It is, in fact, a sad truth about human life that beyond our salad days, very few of us are interesting to look at in the buff.

Speak for yourself, John.