So I stole a meme

1. had your first kiss with?
If we mean post-puberty, then I think it was with the girl mentioned in the post below. Pre, I think it was a girl named Michelle.

2. What would you do with 1,000 plastic spoons?
To be honest I'd probably save them. I'm always breaking or losing those things.

3. What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school?
Elementary school? Lots and lots of show tunes-like Jesus Christ Superstar, Annie, Godspell, Barnum. No, I am not gay. The Star Wars soundtrack, and the "story of the film" albums. The Flash Gordon soundtrack by Queen. I swear I'm not gay. Olivia Newton-John. Muppet Show cast albums. The Sgt Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band movie soundtrack. Alvin & the Chipmunks. Men At Work.

With only a few exceptions, I didn't really get into pop music till Jr. high.

4. What is the best thing about your job?
Job?

5. Do you like more than one person right now?
The question is vague...

6. Are you against same sex marriage?
Why, yes. Yes I am. Fortunately, the couple of gay women who live in my head are quite in favor of it.

8. Where are you going on your next vacation?
Vacation?

9. Do you feel sad now?
No, but I have good deal of denial about the realities of my situation going for me.

10. Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
Again, the question is vague...define your terms!

11. Do you own any furniture from Ikea?
No, I don't think so.

13. If you could be an animal what would you be?
A dolphin or a wolf.

14. What state/country are you from?
California, dude.

15. Tell us about the last conversation/s you had?
An offensively stupid call from the video store telling me something I never checked out was late.

16. Where do you see yourself in one month?
Another year older (September first, he said, glancing towards the Amazon.com wish list) and deeper in depression.

17. What is your favorite smell?
Grass (the kind you find on a lawn, not a euphimism for anything).

18. What is your favorite sight?
Bodies of water. Or just bodies.

19. Do you consider yourself bi-polar?
No. I do, however, have one or two friends who might have differing thoughts on the subject.

21. Have you ever done anything vindictive to your co-worker?
Not in reality, no. But in my fantasies there's a little dwarf who hides under tables with a razor and cuts the tendons of people I feel have humiliated me. Which brings me to the next question:

22. Have you ever gone to therapy?
It's funny you ask that, actually. Yes I have, and yes I am.

23. Have you ever Played Spin the bottle?
No, but I did see a terrible movie by that name a few years ago. It was on DVD, and I had to push "play" to watch it, so I guess you could say I...no. No, I never have.

24. Have you ever Toilet papered someone's house?
Oh, yes. Better yet, someone's car the night after it rained. Have you ever tried to get wet toilet paper off a car?

25. Have you ever liked someone but never told them?
You want the list or should I just say yes?

26. Have you ever gone camping?
Yes. And I'm resisting the urge to make a limp-wristed joke playing on the word "camp" here.

27. Have you ever had a crush on your brother's friend?
No brother, so no.

28. Have you ever been to a nude beach?
No.

29. Have you ever had sex on the beach?
Not to go all Clintonesque on you here, but define "sex." In other words, not to completion, but one or two things have started there...

30. Have you ever had a stalker?
Yes, actually. Or at least, I had a girl from my past hunt me down in order to finish something we'd started a few years ago and that she thought unfinished...

31. Have you ever gone skinny dipping?
No.

32. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?
Yes, I suppose I have. It's not exactly a common occurence, though

33. Have you ever gone to a party where you were the only sober person?
Yes.

34. Have you ever been cheated on?
Not to my knowledge if we're talking cheating=sex. But I've had girlfriends of mine make out with other guys.

35. Have you ever felt betrayed by your best friend?
What else are best friends for?

36. Have you ever lied to your parents?
Yes, certainly. I think it was the first time a child has ever lied to their parents.

37. Have you ever been out of the US?
Yes, once, but unfortunately it was only to Canada (nothing against the lovely country, but...). Also, I've been to Tennessee, which is not so much out of the US as it is out of the realm of fathomability.

38. Have you ever thrown up from working out?
No.

39. Have you ever gotten a haircut so bad that you wore a hat for a month straight?
I'm just going to pause here while everyone reading this who is familiar with the hair that I walk around with on a daily basis has a good, long laugh.

40. Have you ever eaten 3 meals from 3 different fast food places in 1 day?
I don't think so.

42. Have you ever spied on someone you had a crush on?
Not really, unless surreptiously gazing at girls in high school counts as "spying."

43. Have you ever slept with one of your co-workers?
No. Slept with a girl I was in a Rocky Horror Picture Show cast with once.

44. Have you ever seen your best friend naked?
No, and it's probably for the better. Over the years I've had a number of "best friends," but only one of them I'd ever have wanted to see naked. I never did, but I don't want to get into that now...it's all in my first play...

45. Who was the last person you kissed?
Technically, my four-year-old nephew, when I was saying goodbye after baby-sitting him at the park.

46. When was the last time you slept for more then 12 hours straight?
I don't think I ever have.

47. Have you ever been to jail?
No.

48. Who is/are your best friend(s)?
Don't know that I have one at the moment.

49. Have you ever stolen anything?
Yes.

50. Ever drank egg nog?
Never.