Frosty, the snow-

"We got some calls that people thought it was offensive," said New Windsor police Chief Michael Biasotti. "We assumed it was some kids who did it."

Officers found no one home. Assuming the snow sculpture was more prank than nod to Christmas' pagan roots, the police knocked it down. Beat it down with shovels, actually.

"We probably weren't 100 percent correct in going on the property and knocking it down," New Windsor Town Supervisor George Meyers said. "But our intentions were pure. Some people were offended. There are school buses going by there all day."

Many scholars, of course, trace the origin of the modern-day yule log to ancient pagan totems to virility and sun-god worship. Is that what [19-year-old scuptress Jessica Sherer] was going for?

"We just did it because we were really bored, and we thought it'd be funny," she said. "It was huge."

Happy birthday!

Via Shakespeare's Sister, who adds,

Seriously, I can’t remember a time in my childhood I would have been traumatized by a snowpenis. Collapsing into a fit of giggles, maybe.

I'm guessing Shakes didn't grow up in Ohio.