My word!

So. Apparently, there's a Pitcher for the Mets named Kris Benson. I say "apparently" because, as is well-nigh legendary amongst my friends, I am almost completely ignorant of sports figures. Someone in that field has to be pretty famous for me to know who they are. It can be safely assumed, then, that Kris Benson is not really all that famous.

This lack of fame is presumably why the Mets are trading him. This seems to upset his wife, Anna, no end.

"We would never, ever have signed with New York if they had said they were going to trade us," said Anna Benson, 29. "I was Miss [Politically Correct] for the Mets the entire time I was there.

She's apparently now freed from the shackles of political correctness that so constrained her while "they" were under contract with New York. Mrs. Benson, on whom the only thing lower than the cut of her neckline is her brow, had this to say about Michael Moore recently.

"...Forget about how un-American you are, how politically retarded you are, or how fat you look while slobbering your political garbage all over everyone, mainly, I despise you for the fact that you make money off of influencing the young minds of America to be Bush-haters."

"You are a selfish, pathetic excuse for an American, and you can take your big fat ass over to Iraq and get your pig head cut off and stuck on a pig pole. Then, you can have your equally as fat wife make a documentary about how loudly you squealed while terrorists were cutting through all the blubber and chins to..."

Gad, how I wish the Democrats would stop lowering the bar for civilized political discouse in this country.