Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Oh. My. God.

This is going to be one of those posts that I feel compelled to start out by saying: I am absolutely not making this up. One or two of you may remember the Abstinence Clearinghouse, which, as it sounds, is a group that promotes saving sex for marriage.

I wrote about them late last year when they had the bright idea of merchandising cherry-flavored (I am not kidding) lollypops with "just say no to sex" messages on the stem.

But that was just kind of stupid, mostly, and also a little bit funny.

This is not funny.

The Abstinence Clearinghouse also sponsors something they call "the Father-Daughter Purity Ball."

Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

The "Father-Daughter Purity Ball" is a dance, you see, like a prom. Only at the end of this one, the girls recite a pledge to their "dates"....their fathers.

Digby says:

You have to see it to believe it. They are all dressed up like prom goers, the dads in tuxes and the daughters in evening gowns looking all grown up. They dance, they laugh, they giggle. And then father and daughter stand up, holding each others hands, staring into each others' eyes and the girls make these vows as if in a wedding ceremony.

The pledge goes a little something like this.

I pledge to remain sexually pure...until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my husband. ... I know that God requires this of me.. that he loves me. and that he will reward me for my faithfulness.

Already, creepy enough, right? Wait, there's more. These are not 15 or 16 or 17 year old girls I'm talking about here, no no. This is what I'm talking about, in an actual picture from one of the balls.
As Digby also says, in a separate post:
I can understand why the little girls would want to do this. It's a chance to dress up and spend time with their father. If it were for another purpose, it might be sweet.


But instead, it's unspeakably corrupt.

This upsets me more than words can say.

2 comments:

Libby said...

so are you against abstinence or is the part about parents passing down their values that you find so "sickening"?

Ben Varkentine said...

I don't mind at all if parents "passing down their values" teach their children it is better to wait to have sex until it will be special.

Indeed, that's what I would hope my daughter or son will do, if I ever have one.

But I'm against abstinence-only sex ed. Partly because I think the people who promote it tend to do so dishonestly, and because there is a sexist double-standard.

But mostly because it doesn't work.

What sickens me, though, is the notion of taking little girls who probably cannot even, and definitely *should* not even, understand their own sexuality, and making them pledge their virtue.

To their *dads*.

There's more than one reason why that's twisted to me, but among them is that it seems to rely on an idea of children as property.

Children are not property. They are RESPONSIBILITY.