Sing it, Mac

Blender's 50 Worst Things To Happen To Music. Seems pretty dead-on to me. Especially:

Number 07: Finding God.
Number 50: Sgt Pepper.

Now I know what you're thinking, but hear them out, read their reasons and see if you don't agree:

Concept albums, progressive rock, Brian Wilson's nervous breakdown, baby boomers yammering away about the Summer of Love, musicians taking themselves more seriously than cancer surgeons -- all the Beatles' fault.

Now think about it, is "When I'm 64" really worth all that tsuris?

Number 31: Jazz Fusion.
Number 06: Madonna's British Accent.
Number 44: Rock Poets:

Memo to aspiring rock stars: Lyrics do not constitute poetry. Neither do pedestrian observations your lifecoach thinks are profound. And despite what Jim Morrison seemed to believe, disturbed Freudian ramblings you howl while waving your dick around onstage are also, alas, not poetry. Please "cc" Jewel, Billy Corgan and Jeff Tweedy on this memo.

And perhaps best of all, number 41: Melisma. Oh yes, lord. This elevation of technical mastery over any genuine emotional life in the song is why I will never watch American Idol and why I will never forgive Mariah Carey...no matter how nice her T&A is (are?).

And some people tell me my beloved synth pop is soulless. Speaking of which, as a loyal Pet Shop Boys fan, I have to register official objections to the listing of Ecstacy and syn drums...but I understand what they're talking about.

Their number 43 seems to contradict itself. It's labeled: "Fake Non-Lesbians." Which would seem to be a wag of the finger at things like the "shocking" Madonna/Christina/Britney kiss. But their caption reads:

Don't get us wrong -- we love lesbians. Just so long as they're not playing music. From Melissa Etheridge to the Indigo Girls, real-live Sapphic rock stars are to blame for some truly awful trends: earnest coffeehouse confessionalism, the Lilith Fair, flannel.

Now t.A.T.u., on the other hand ...

So which is it? Personally, I can go either way.

...As it were.

I would have added to this list:

The big-hollow-dick swagger of Rock Stars. Then again, they do include both Van Hagar and Fred Durst on their list, so I guess they've got that covered.

The death of Kirsty MacColl. But I admit that's personal.

Indie movie soundtracks full of dreadful songs with "clever" titles riffing on pop-culture.

The Simpsons Sing The Blues.

Self-conciously political songs.

Morrissey's solo career(Viva Hate excepted, and maybe one or two other singles). That ought to get me knocked off Shakespeare's Sister's blogroll, but I stand by it.

And finally:

"Throw your hands in the air! And wave 'em like you just don't care!"