Garrison Keillor is just like Maureen Dowd & Arianna Huffington

...in that he's not one of my favorite performers or writers, but when he writes a good piece, he writes a good piece. He's written a good piece for the Baltimore Sun, in which he gives his opinions on why the Republicans have run aground.

As I say, it's a good piece. My only problem with it is a couple of times he makes clearly intended-to-be-ironic statements to which I reacted with all the hope of a young boy at Christmas.

As with:

I see by the papers that the Republicans want to make an issue of Nancy Pelosi in the congressional races this fall: Would you want a San Francisco woman to be speaker of the House?

Will the podium be repainted in lavender stripes with a disco ball overhead? Will she be borne into the chamber by male dancers with glistening torsos and wearing pink tutus?

Will she?

And then:

You might not have always liked Republicans, but you could count on them to manage the bank. They might be lousy tippers, act snooty, talk through their noses, wear spats and splash mud on you as they race their Pierce-Arrows through the village, but you knew they could do the math.

To see them produce a ninny and then follow him loyally into the swamp for five years is disconcerting, like seeing the Rolling Stones take up lite jazz.

I wish.

Look what we can do

Via Yahoo! News:

KATMANDU, Nepal - Just days after a British climber was left to die near Mount Everest's summit, an American guide abandoned his second bid to stand on top of the world so he could rescue a mountaineer mistakenly given up for dead.

Not only did Daniel Mazur not scale the world's highest peak from the northern side, he also failed to get his two paying clients to the top.

Mazur, his two clients and a Sherpa guide were just two hours from the 29,035-foot peak on the morning of May 26 when they came across 50-year-old Lincoln Hall, who was left a day earlier when his own guides believed he was dead.

"I was shocked to see a guy without gloves, hat, oxygen bottles or sleeping bag at sunrise at 28,200 feet height, just sitting up there," said Mazur, who scaled Everest once before, from the southern side, in 1991.

Mazur said Hall's first words to him were: "I imagine you are surprised to see me here."

Mazur said he knew Hall was OK because he was not crying for help and still had a sense of humor.

While Mazur's team was busy assisting Hall, two Italian climbers walked past them toward the summit. When asked to help, they claimed they did not understand English. On his return to base camp, Mazur discovered they did.

"I don't know why they didn't want to stop to help," Mazur said. "I hope when I am there, in that state, and someone passes me ... I hope it is someone like me."

Look what we can do.

His show's still not my cup of tea, but...

...Marc Cherry seems like an admirable guy. At least, that's the impression I gleamed from the new book Desperate Networks, by Bill Carter; my Amazon review went up yesterday.

Let's go to the movies, let's go see the stars

Okay, these are quotes from 15 of my favorite movies. How many can you name? And no fair cheating by looking them up; I'll know.

One:

When teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings, it's usually because they are being treated like human beings.

Two:

"...nothing I ever do is good enough. Not beautiful enough, it's not funny enough, it's not deep enough, it's not anything enough. Now, when I see a rose, that's perfect. I mean, that's perfect. I want to look up to God and say, 'How the hell did you do that? And why the hell can't I do that?"

"Now that's probably one of your better con lines."

"Yeah, it is. But that doesn't mean I don't mean it."

Three:

Mother? I love art.

Four:

"...who's Ann Miller?"
"Leave this house."

Five:

I resent you. I resent everything about you. You had Mom and Dad's unconditional love, now you have the world's. How could I not envy that? I wish I could say it was because you're so much better looking than me. No, the real pain is that it's something so much harder to bear. You got the good soul; I got the bad one. Think about leaving me yours...

Six:

"He just came in for few hours to uh, to uh, fuck me."
"It takes a few hours."

Seven:

"Now what the Good Master is telling us all right now is that up in Heaven, there are about a hundred million little tiny angels about 'yea' by 'yea', and they all take shorthand. And every time you do something silly, they write it down..."
"No, no."
"That's not what the Good Master is telling us."

Eight:

Then, I was inspired. Now, I'm sad and tired.

Nine:

"Are you nervous?"
"No."
"Good. My nervousness exists on several levels; number one, and this is in no particular order, I haven't done this in a pretty long time. Number two, uh, any expectations that you might have, given the fact that I'm... you know..."
"The most powerful man in the world?"
"Exactly, thank you. I think it's important you remember that's a political distinction, it comes with the office."

10:

"What's the boogeyman?"
"As a matter of fact... that was."

11:

I don't want you
You bust me up
I don't need you
You burn me up
I don't love you
You plug me in
Leave me alone
You switch me on
I'm self-contained
You light me up
Just go away

12:

"You were wonderful! We're free!"
"Kara, we're inside a Russian airbase in the middle of Afghanistan!"

13:

"It is symbolic of our struggle against oppression."
"It's symbolic of his struggle against reality."

14:

"I'll meet you at the place, near the thing, where we went, that time."
"Okay, I'll meet you there."

15:

Every meal's a banquet! Every paycheck a fortune...I LOVE the corps!

You are so rare to me (UPDATED)

Since he figured out how to post embedded video clips on his blog, something that still eludes me (I'm so ignorant of technology we're lucky I can understand the chair), Mark Evanier has been something of a precious resource.

Well, he kinda already was, but...skip it. I was just looking for a cute way to link to Mark's presentation of a clip from the great old Sid Caesar show. It shows Sid, Carl Reiner and Howie Morris doing a takeoff on the then-new phenomenon of rock n' roll groups and teen idols.

Sometimes when you look back at things like this the people taking the shots come off as smug and condescending jackasses who are about to be left behind by the freight train of history. Not so here.

The trio take the shots where they deserve to be taken and they do it with such commitment and they're having such obvious fun that this clip is still funny some 50-odd years (give or take) since it was first broadcast.

Also, at one point, I swear you can see Caesar inventing breakdancing. Enjoy.

UPDATE: And Shakespeare's Sister found the DS desk segments I mentioned. If you're anything like me, you'll laugh till tears come out of your eyes.

PS: Or if clips from great comedy shows of the past aren't your thing, Mark also found the entire Stewart vs. Bennett debate from the night before last.

Well, duh

You Belong in San Francisco

You crave an eclectic, urban environment. You're half California, half NYC. You're open minded, tolerant, and secretly think you're the best. People may dismiss you as a hippie, but you're also progressive, interesting, and rich!

Where Does Your Inner Californian Belong?

A cheap shot

Ashlee Simpson displaying the endearing young charms that have made her what she is today.



Via Bricks and Stones.

Priorities

GOP Senator David Vitter says of gay marriage: "I don't believe there's any issue that's more important than this one"

David Vitter is the GOP Senator from New Orleans.

Via AmericaBlog.

Jon Stewart shows why he's a national treasure

I assume that most of you watch The Daily Show...well, daily. But if by any chance you missed last night's you owe it to yourself to look for a re-run. Stewart started out by taking on the supersition surrounding yesterday's date better than I've ever seen it done.

The rest of the show was about gay marriage; first in a desk segment with Jon (later joined by Rob Cordry) that was TDS at it's make-you-laugh-so-hard-you'll-think-you're coughing-up-blood best.

Then, a debate with the racist Bill Bennett. Crooks and Liars has a clip and partial transcript, but you'll want to see the whole thing.

Bennett Look, it's a debate about whether you think marriage is between a man and a women.

Stewart:I disagree, I think it's a debate about whether you think gay people are part of the human condition or just a random fetish.

Tell it, brother. C&L adds:

Jon always boils the debate down to it's simplest form which usually causes people like Bennett to look foolish.

Five words (and a long, satisfied sound) on those couple of new templates I was trying recently

There's no place like home...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

The greatest talk show lineup in recent televisual memory

The list of guests for tonights episode of The Tonight Show, with Jay Leno:

Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy, Bill Engvall and...Tim Russert.

David Lee Roth, too.

Now that is a party.

I resent that slur on my dancing

-and driving too, come to think of it.

Your Personality Is Like Alcohol

You're the life of the party, a total flirt, and probably a pretty big jokester. Sometimes your behavior gets you in trouble, but you still remain socially acceptable. You're a pretty bad driver, and you're dancing could also use a little work!

What Drug Is Your Personality Like?

This could be promising

Winona Ryder is reuniting with the scribe who wrote "Heathers" and helped establish the actress as the edgy "it" girl for Generation X.

Ryder has signed on to star as a feminist vigilante who becomes an urban folk hero in "Sex and Death 101," which Daniel Waters wrote and is directing.

Ah, Dan Waters. For me, one of the big question marks among writers. I mean, like it says up there he wrote "Heathers," one of the more perfect movies of the past 15-20 years. He then spent the rest the '90s writing (or at least having his name attached to) varying degrees of crap (Two words: "Hudson Hawk").

But there's no way of knowing how much the final results of those movies reflected his scripts. I do know in the case of "Batman Returns" he's criticised Tim Burton's treatment...which makes him even more my brother.

I have not seen his direct-to-video directorial debut, "Happy Campers" but perhaps I should.

And Ms. Ryder has quite simply never done anything else in her career as...again I come back to the word perfect...as "Heathers" was. So their working together again could be quite promising...quite promising indeed.

I wonder what the story's about?

The story follows a man (Simon Baker) whose life is upended by a mysterious e-mail containing the 101 names of every woman he has had sex with and, eerily, every woman he will have sex with in the future. He is stopped in his tracks when he meets Ryder, a femme fatale who targets men guilty of sex crimes against women.

Cool! Sounds like a Martin Scorcese film of a Harlan Ellison story, which I would certainly want to see.

Julie Bowen ("Boston Legal") also has joined the cast and will play No. 29 on the long list of Baker's libidinous conquests.

Cooler! The star and writer of one of my favorite movies reunited for what sounds like an interesting story, and joined by a star of one of my favorite TV series. Who could ask for anything more?

The movie will be "hard R" for nudity, sex scenes and frequent references to sex, said producer Cary Brokaw.

No comment.

Source: Yahoo! News.

I'm a weak, pathetic shell of a man

I don't like Jessica Simpson much. Believe it or not, I have no respect for her as an artist. As for the question that occasionally gets raised of Is she an airhead? Or is she playing one on TV and in the movies?

I've always thought, doesn't matter. Either she's really a dumb woman making it on the basis of her looks, which I don't like. Or she's cynically pretending to be a dumb woman, making it on sexist appeal, which I don't like.

And I've never even thought she was that cute compared to, say, the Chicks of Dixie. But...

God help me, she looks really, really good in these pictures.


I don't know if I can sleep with myself tonight...

"The hills are aaliive...with the sound of muusic..."

Shakespeare's Sister's latest "caption this photo" fun.

Hey you fool, watch out! You'll get mauled by...

A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lioness in Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a zoo official said on Monday.

"The man shouted 'God will save me, if he exists', lowered himself by a rope into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the official said.

"A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid artery."

Reuters.com.

I thought Monty Python settled this years ago! God exists, by two falls to a submission.

Do you ever wonder about Ann Coulter's relationship with her father?

Because lately when I read her statements, I get this image of a forlorn 13-year-old girl in heels too high for her, too much makeup and earrings too big for her head stamping her little foot and saying "Goddamnit, daddy! Pay some attention to me!"

Statements like these:

Ann on the widowed wives of September 11:

"These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities, and stalked by grief-erazzis. I've never seen people enjoying their husbands' death so much."

To which I have only to say, this.

Do you know what this quote has to do with this picture (and vice-versa)?

When the individuality of the artist begins to express itself, what the artist gains in the way of liberty he loses in the way of order, and when you're no longer able to attach yourself to an order, basically that's very bad...

Should I be worried that they don't think I'd make an excellent writer?

Your Career Type: Artistic

You are expressive, original, and independent. Your talents lie in your artistic abilities: creative writing, drama, crafts, music, or art. You would make an excellent: Actor - Art Teacher - Book Editor Clothes Designer - Comedian - Composer Dancer - DJ - Graphic Designer Illustrator - Musician - Sculptor The worst career options for your are conventional careers, like bank teller or secretary.

What's Your Ideal Career?

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

You Belong in 1961

If you scored... 1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in! 1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too. 1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all! 1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day. 1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good!

What Year Do You Belong In?

This can't be right. 1961? Oh great, just in time for the Bay Of Pigs. I can see whether Kennedy really was all that and a bag o'chips.

On the bright side, maybe I can find Boy George as an infant and tell him not to mess with Dr. Dream.

I could take in certain classic Disney movies on the big screen...but thanks to their pre-video rerelease policy, I did that anyway. But I could also still see Warner Bros. cartoons that way!

But still, 1961? The year the Rolling Stones musical career began? Me? (Don't pretend you're not enjoying this, Sherman) On the other hand, I would get to experience the rise of the Beatles. And there's always the beginning of Sinatra's Reprise years. And Motown, can't forget the Motor City.

But...me, some 20-25 years before the rise of electro? This can't be right.

Although you know, I could go see a few of the last classic Broadway musicals, including one of my favorites, Carnival....

1961, hmmmmm...

(We're not going-Keitha)

That settles that.

I was gonna make jokes, but that's almost spookily accurate

You Are Iceman

You tried to live a normal life, but it just wasn't possible A bit of a slacker, you rather tell jokes than cultivate your powers Powers: turning self and others into ice, making ice weapons, becoming nearly invisible

Which of the X-Men Are You?

The world is coming to an end

• Haditha.
• Militants in Palestine (or actually, anywhere).
• It now costs almost $40 to fill my tank with gas.
• George Bush is once again cynically (and kind of inexplicably, as Mark Evanier writes) exploiting homophobia for political purposes.
  
• Unattractive photos of Kate Winslet.

Well, that about wraps it up for this lifetime.

It's been some time since I indulged in a little gratuitious Tennessee-bashing

...so let's take care of that right now. This is from Frank Rich's Sunday NY Times column, via True Blue Liberal...

The current Senate majority leader, Bill Frist, has proudly put on this month’s legislative agenda constitutional amendments to stop same-sex marriage and flag burning. “Right now people in this country are saying it’s O.K. to desecrate that flag and to burn it,” he said on Fox News last Sunday, though it’s not clear exactly who these traitors are. A Nexis search turns up only one semi-recent American flag-burning incident — by a drunk and apparently apolitical teenager in Mr. Frist’s home state, Tennessee, in 2005.

Ahem. "Duck-humping, homophobic, rock-stupid, anti-sex, illiterate, flag-burning hillbillies!"

Ahhh. I feel much better. It's not good for me to hold those in too long.

Unfortunately, the rest of Rich's column is not funny at all, as he concludes:

We know that even as coalition partners like Italy and South Korea bail out, we are planning an indefinite stay of undefined parameters: the 104-acre embassy complex rising in the Green Zone is the largest in the world, and the Decider himself has said that it’s up to “future presidents and future governments of Iraq” to decide our exit strategy.

Actually, the current government of Iraq already is. On Thursday the latest American-backed Iraqi prime minister, Nuri Kamal al-Maliki, whom Mr. Bush is “proud to call” his “ally and friend,” invited open warfare on American forces by accusing them of conducting Haditha-like killing sprees against civilians as a “regular” phenomenon. If this is the ally and friend we are fighting for, a country that truly supports the troops has no choice but to start bringing them home.

Random Flickr-Blogging: IMG_1339

Hi there; I'm participating in something that Tom Hilton came up with.

Here's how it works:
Every week, we all start with the same randomly-generated four-digit number (call it ####).

Go to Flickr and search for "IMG_####". There should be anywhere from a few hundred to a couple thousand results.

Choose an image from among the results, post it to your blog (be sure to include attribution and a link back to the page where the image appears--this is done automatically if you use the 'blog this' feature in Flickr).
The rest is up to you. Write about the place shown in the image. Make up a story about it. Connect it to some issue you care about. Or just post it as an image you really like. Do whatever you want.

I think I like this one because this kid looks like he's already pushing his boundaries and he's only five months old. Also, in a neat bit of freaky symmetry...his name is Tom. Careful, kid, push too hard and you're gonna fall off the other end of that sofa.

...and if that isn't a metaphor for life, I don't know what is...

What he said

From Vincent van Gogh: Genius and Disaster, by A.M. Hammacher:

Poetry is actually more terrible than painting, he once said, for painters can at least keep silent.

I KNEW it!

So, you've heard me mention Bryan Adams, specifically, that I have a rant about him. It goes a little something like this: If I ever snap-I mean up on the water tower with a high powered rifle snap-and they come to you and they say, you read the man's blog, what do you think could have pushed him over the edge?

Two simple words: Bryan Adams.

Now, I don't think I've ever mentioned Voice Farm here, but they were a synth/punk (mostly synth) duo from San Francisco, Myke Reilly and Charly Brown. They achieved local radio success with a 1987 self-titled album, one of the coolest records ever.

They then released an inferior (to my ears, but it's got a couple of great songs) album, Bigger Cooler Weirder on a major label, Morgan Creek. Hitting the national dance charts with the samplejam "Free Love" & torch song "Seeing Is Believing."

I was just idly Googling them, as you do, when I came across this article from the SF Weekly seven years ago. The emphasis in the below quoted paragraph is mine.

Then Voice Farm all but disappeared. Blame Bryan Adams. Just as Bigger Cooler Weirder hit the streets, the film arm of Morgan Creek was getting set to release the Kevin Costner vehicle Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. It went looking for synergy -- and found it in "Everything I Do, I Do It for You," the soundtrack's putrid single, which would be jackhammered into the public consciousness throughout the summer of 1991. The bulk of Morgan Creek's promotional energies went into "Everything I Do," which left Voice Farm in the lurch. "The consensus was, 'Yeah, why put money into this experimental San Francisco band?'" says Reilly. "After all those years of working and developing our act ... it was sort of a hard blow. So I guess I lost my faith in the music industry."

And then they were assimilated by the Borg-I'm sorry, I mean, and then they started producing music for television commercials. As if I needed more fuel for the fire of my Bryan Adams hatred...

Come in, London...

Kind of a nice blog here by a couple documenting their trip across England with blog entries and photographs.

Kristen Bell IS Rory Gilmore in...

Actually, that's (top) a picture of Bell in costume for her upcoming film, Fanboys. But the headline is the first thing it made me think of.

Rory Gilmore (or more properly, Alexis Bledel) is seen above. Next season, Veronica Mars will air right after Gilmore Girls on their new, shared CW network.

There was a time, really not all that long ago, that this news would have excited me. But now, with my returning to Veronica Mars still very much up in the air after its writing spun out of control during the second half of last season; Gilmore Girls a definite "thanks, but no thanks" following its season finale (and the Palladinos departure)...well, it's funny how quickly things can change when your favorite shows go down the drain.

I feel like letting out my inner bitch, so...

...Let's play fashion police!

See, this is almost a nice outfit, and then...oh dear.

Veronica Mars cleverly disguises herself as a piece of luggage.

...and then she transformed herself into a helicopter and flew away...

How to get global warming through to comic book fans

Elliot S. Maggin, a longtime comic book writer, points out that if this were Krypton and Al Gore were Jor-El...

[Jor-El,] you will recall, is Superman's Kryptonian father, an eminent scientist whom the ruling "Science Council" of his world laughed out of the room when he told them that they were facing a planetary crisis: "Gentlemen, Krypton is doomed."

Like the Science Council, our leaders reacted with guffaws when one of our own rose to sound an earthshaking alarm. As a professional fabulist, by contrast, my reaction to Al Gore's 1992 book, "Earth in the Balance," was one of enormous excitement. It had pathos and drama, and extraordinary ideas expressed clearly and simply: a proposal for a new paradigm for the relationship between humanity and the planet.

Fiction, when it's any good, is a fantasy that tells the truth. Given the characters and degrees of suspension of disbelief with which you seed your story, you have to be internally consistent. A hero, for example, cannot choose as a matter of preference to let a bad guy get away with murder — or theft, or extortion, or environmental exploitation. And a group of characters established as a stodgy, priggish oligarchy of entrenched rulers cannot choose to accede to the warnings of an upstart — a rival, really — who makes a case, no matter how compelling, for an extensive and costly solution to a pressing problem. More likely, the rulers would deny that the problem exists.

Veritasiness

At the close of his commencement speech before 250 graduates (and 4000 others) at tiny Knox College in Galesburg, Ill. on Saturday, satirist Stephen Colbert left them with a piece of advise: Get your own TV show. “It pays well," he observed, "the hours are great and you have fans. Eventually, some nice people will give you an honorary degree for doing jack squat.”

Colbert, who slipped in and out of his rightwing blowhard TV persona on Comedy Central’s “The Colbert Report,” received an overwhelmingly positive response compared with the mixed reaction at the recent White House Correspondents Dinner. Afterward, students presented him with a purple “Veritasiness Tour” t-shirt (which translates, very roughly, as “truthiness”).

Colbert had opened his speech with: "My name is Stephen Colbert, but I play a person on TV named Stephen Colbert ... who says things with a straight face that he doesn't mean."

In that vein, Colbert considered the immigration debate: “It’s time for illegal immigrants to go — right after they finish (building) those walls." People keep saying immigrants built America, “but here's the thing, it's built now." His suggestions for securing the U.S.-Mexico border went beyond walls to include moats, fiery moats and fiery moats with fire-proof crocodiles.

He added that the border with Canada also has to be secure so Canadians cannot bring their "skunky beer" into the country. He backed English as the official language of the United States — “God wrote (the Bible) in English for a reason: So it could be taught in our public schools.”

Noting the college was founded by abolitionists, Colbert came out against slavery. “I just hope the mainstream media gives me credit for the stand I’ve taken today,” he said.

Source.

All I got left with was tears; Seven lonely volunteers

I've just finished preparing a (first draft of a) chapter outline of My Girlfriend's Boyfriend to send to the publishers, and I'm looking for volunteers to read it and tell me what they think. Ideally these should be, at least partly, people who haven't read any of the full versions, because I'm trying to see how this reads to an audience that doesn't know the story.

Anyone?

ETA: Oh, and I should give public thanks to Bob Black, who helped out by sending me a sample of onea them chapter outline things. I'd never seen one before.

Apart from McCartney, Bowie, Morrissey & Partridge, this list is mostly a buncha shit

The results of that Paste Magazine 100 Best Living Songwriters poll that I talked about a few months ago are out. As I said at the time, I have some issues with who they chose to define as "songwriters."

For example,

80 Pink Floyd

Now: Are they talking about Roger Waters? I presume they are, since I understand him to have written both words and music for most of the songs you think of when you think of Pink Floyd. So why not just say so?

Similarly, as pleased as I am to see--

57 Morrissey

--above Sting but below James Brown, I still think it was ludicrious to nominate him separately from Johnny Marr at all. And you're telling me I now live in a world in which

36 Beck

is ranked a better songwriter than

37 Smokey Robinson?

That ain't right. And of course:

12 The Rolling Stones

What I've said before still stands. The day anyone can name one song off the last Stones album by the time the next one comes out, is the day I'll believe there's a reason to give a ratfucking piss about them for anyone not in the baby boom generation.

2 Neil Young

I look at Neil Young sort of the way I look at Michael Moore or Al Gore. Even though I know he's almost legendary to many, and there is reason for me to respect him, I think he's more about self-promotion than his fanbase suspects and I trust him less far than I could throw him.

Finally,

1 BOB DYLAN

See The Rolling Stones and double it.

Here's an item that had my sympathy and mild curiosity...untill...

So it seems that the Grateful Dead's last keyboard player has died. Apparently he had been quite despondent since Jerry Garcia passed away, and it's believed that he took his own life. Now, as you can well imagine if you know anything at all about my musical taste, the Dead were not, by and large, my cup of tea. Liked their version of the Twilight Zone theme for the '80s revival, that's about it.

But, I like to think I'm not completely insensitive to the feelings of a man who must have been in a great deal of pain. And there is also the creepy-funny aspect of it: Keyboard players for the Grateful Dead have apparently roughly the same life expectancy of drummers for Spinal Tap.

That's what I was thinking as I read this item, and then I got to this paragraph:

Originally a member of the 1970s rock band "The Tubes," Welnick joined the Grateful Dead after longest-serving keyboard player Brent Mydland died in 1990 of a drug overdose.

Waitaminute. This guy was the keyboard player in The Tubes? Forget it. Motherfucker deserved to die. Now he's in the level of hell reserved for people who should never have put their hands on a damn keyboard.

I don't know where I was coming from when I said country music fans don't like strong women

You weirdos who don't like the Dixie Chicks are going to want to scroll down. Via North Jersy Media:

One of the more innocuous explanations given to the Dixie Chicks as to why country radio hasn't been playing their new single, "Not Ready to Make Nice," is because the defiant song doesn't fit in with everything else that's playing on the dial.

"I don't even know what's played on country radio, but when they tell me some titles, it cracks me up," says lead singer Natalie Maines, sitting in a swank New York hotel as the group promotes its new album, "Taking the Long Way."

"Besides, where would we fit on the playlist between 'Honky Tonk Badonkadonk' and 'Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off'?" asks Maines, citing two recent country hits, as the rest of the Chicks -- sisters Martie Maguire and Emily Robison -- join in her laughter.

"We don't want to be a square peg," pipes in Robison, while Maines adds: "We'd rather be the square peg on the other side!"

I suppose I'm the only one who, reading that, wishes the Chicks would cover the theme to the 1982 sitcom...yeah, I thought so. Onward!

"It just [ticks] me off," says a steamed Maguire. Growing up, she found herself defending country music to friends who saw it as a close-minded, conservative genre that had little variety or tolerance for differing opinions.

"I just feel stupid. I was trying to convince people that that stereotype wasn't real ... but it does exist. I thought it was the old school," she says. "Now I wouldn't blame anyone if they didn't want to listen to it."

"I want [the new album] to be successful to prove to myself that the music matters," says Maines, "and radio and organized far right people can't determine your destiny."

That's not his Fortress Of Solitude, that's Brokeback Mountain

Excerpted from the LA Times:

...you would think that Warner Bros. might have been happy with Alonso Duralde's cover story about "Superman Returns," which gushed, "Superheroes — let's face it — are totally hot."

There was a twist: Duralde's "Superman Returns" story was not in Entertainment Weekly or Newsweek or Premiere. It ran in the May 23 issue of the Advocate, the prominent national gay magazine, next to the headline: "How Gay Is Superman?"

...as several entertainment and cultural writers have noted, superheroes hold obvious — and growing — gay appeal. In addition to being strikingly good-looking, the characters often are portrayed as alienated outsiders, typically leading double lives.

Warner Bros. declined to comment. But the studio is reaching out to some gay moviegoers. Warners has bought "Superman Returns" advertising time on Logo, a year-old digital cable channel in 20 million homes that calls itself "the channel for Gay America."

I would think Warner Bros. would decline to comment, considering the blue costume that DC had temporarily stuck Superman in all those years ago.



Back to the Times:

Despite the gay-branding issues "Superman" might face, there are a number of hit pop culture products that have benefited greatly from gay and lesbian fans.

The 1990s TV series "Xena: Warrior Princess" had a loyal and large following among lesbians (which the show courted) and the rock band Queen maintained a huge audience of young straight males despite the gay imagery of its name, music and stage shows. In comics, it has become increasingly common to not only create new gay characters but also to rework the mythology of long-time heroes to make them gay, as is the case with both Batwoman and Colossus.

Excuse me, I need a moment, I've been out of comics for a long time. Colossus is gay? But...but...but Kitty Pride...but...

Molly Ivins

It's times like this I long for Al Gore to have watched State Of The Union, a Tracy/Hepburn film directed by Frank Capra that if he'd watched, he'd be president today. (And from which Ronald Reagan stole one of the most widely quoted examples of his "wit.")

The lovely and talented Ms. Ivins has a couple of items that could make me re-think my resistance to the idea of another Gore run. First, the latest on what we did, what our soldiers did for us, in Haditha.

So, Haditha becomes another of the names at which we wince, along with Abu Ghraib, Guantanamo and My Lai. Tell you what: Let’s not use the “stress of combat” excuse this time. According to neighbors, the girls in the family of Younis Khafif—the one who kept pleading in English, “I am a friend. I am good”—were 14, 10, 5, 3 and 1. What are they going to say? “Under stress of combat, we thought the baby was 2”?

Then this latest example of the way the Bush administration handles screw-ups: With reward and promotion.

Two weeks ago, Amir Taheri had an Op-Ed article in the Canadian National Post claiming that the Iranians have a law requiring Jews to wear yellow badges. It turned out to be a complete fabrication and has been the subject of much contempt among bloggers. So Tuesday, Taheri was invited to the White House along with other “experts” to give the president their “honest opinions.” With advice like that, our war in Iran will be a slam-dunk.

But in the end, you have to thank god for the English and their sense of wit, as Molly says:

Tony Blair...joined Bush in a mistake-admitting-athon last week. (The Prez is sorry he talked “too tough” to the terrorists.) Neither of them thought to name “the war in Iraq,” for example, as a mistake. But, as The Economist rather unkindly put it, their meeting was “The Axis of Feeble."

A Mark Gibson Television Production

Okay, so it's a blog, not a TV show, but those words just sound like they should follow. Mark was kind enough to give me a little shout-out in his blog, so I'm gonna return the favor and send you round to his.



If nothing else, I owe him some sort of payback for reproducing the cover of this Dell comic that is creepy and just not right. Especially if you've heard the things about Chuck Connors that I've heard.

(Five words: "The Rifleman is double-cocking.")

Def.Con.One, Hey what's occurring? What goes on?

And the groundswell begins.

I'd like to be, under the sea, in an...

PZ Myers has a thing for octopi and the like. Today, he's indulging that love with a collection of links and pics.

The one on the right is a Japanese manhole cover, I'm not quite sure where the one below comes from.

"LGBT" sounds like a progressive rock band

You know, something like Yes without their one strong song...Ladies and gentlemen, LGBT!

But seriously, folks...a blog called Mombian has declared this "Blogging for LGBT Families Day." The idea is to "help show the strength of those who support LGBT families and their rights."

Well, I certainly support that. But what specifically to write about?

I think that, and I hope I don't get brickbats for being too obvious, the gay community is in some ways in their most precarious position ever. Absolute full rights are inevitable, and I believe we'll see it within the next generation. Unfortunately, this means that those who-although they can come up with a lot of nonsense to distract from this-don't think as homosexuals as people, are digging in. They're going to make "a last stand."

The movie reference is unintentional, but given X-Men's easy reading as metaphor for the gay or other minority experience, maybe it shouldn't be.

On the other hand, there are people who have been waiting so long for the acknowledgement they should have been given "from the womb to the tomb." But they're too quick (IMO) to follow anything that even looks like light.

See everything from Mary Cheney, to those who thought the White House wouldn't screw them at the Easter Egg Roll, to the inexplicable success of The L Word. I think it's a very, very precarious time.

But at least I know which camp I'm in.

It was only a matter of time, really

Frankly, I'm surprised it took them this long.

What?

Pop rocker Pink was blown away after giving a speech to 700 girls at Toronto's Humberside Collegiate Institute while promoting her album 'I'm Not Dead', after a group of Paris Hilton wannabes slammed her words...

Pink enjoyed screams and applause from the majority of the girls, except for a group of 15-year-old miss prisses who threw insults at her, such as, "Maybe you put down girls like Paris because you are soooo fat and UGLY!"

The singer remained confident in her views, and told them to avoid the "stupid girl epidemic".

The Hilton wannabes snapped back, "You're just jealous because Paris has talent!"

Paris Hilton has fans?

Paris Hilton has talent?

Source: Tittle-Tattle, via Dlisted, where Michael K. sez:

I've seen Paris act, sing, dance and even suck dick...she can't do any of those things right.

Killer

Now, I don't think much one way or other about Tom Petty. Like some of the singles, that's about it. Similarly, Jeff Lynne. ELO was just a little before my time. Although...(looks one way, then the other, then decides oh, the heck with it and admits) Xanadu is something of a guilty pleasure. I've always said Prince was a musical genius, though.

...but that doesn't explain why this clip of Petty, Lynne and Prince performing George Harrison's "While My Guitar Gently Weeps" is so killer. BTW, I'm pretty sure that kid strumming away on an acoustic behind Petty is Dhani Harrison, George's son.

Reasons to save us, and keep it all painless.

On the one hand, we invented what we laughably call the democratic political system. On the other, one of us can do things like this. Hey St. Peter, would you call that even?

I know it's true, oh so true, cause I saw it on TV

The enemy cannot defeat us on the battlefield, but what they
can do is put horrible images on our TV screens.

--George Bush, Philadelphia Congressional Dinner, May 24, 2006

Source.

Okay, I'll do the obvious joke: You can call him Al

If you can take another Al Gore post, Nora Ephron has a good one at the Huffington.

Excerpt:

What sets the Gore movie apart is not the way it's made, or even the power of its material about global warming, but the reaction of the audience. The audience -- which is to say, us, us liberals, us on the left -- is mortified. Deeply mortified. Icecaps melt, lakes dry up, there are hurricanes and heatwaves, but as you watch, what really goes through your head are the number of Americans and Iraqis who are dead because Gore isn't President, and the realization that we're in some way to blame.

Al Gore doesn't make it to the top three reasons on my list of Who's To Blame -- Bill Clinton, Ralph Nader and Karl Rove are way ahead of him. But Gore's on the list, he and Bob Schrum and the rest of his advisors. There was triangulation. There was caution. There was the third debate. There was bad makeup. We cared about those things, we said so aloud, we were disappointed in his candidacy, we stood by and watched the Republicans steal the Presidency from him and on some level we behaved as if it somehow proved that the system worked.

I think Ephron is somewhat overrated as a director/screenwriter (and her sister, Amy, once threatened me), but I give her props for this.

I'm always up for a little beauty

Sparked by PZ Myers' list of beautiful things...

The ocean.

The synthesizer. That's a Prophet V. sequencer, BTW, since I know you were wondering. As used by Thompson Twins.



Terry Gilliam movies, which for some reason I've chosen to represent with this vidcap of Uma Thurman as Venus in The Adventures Of Baron Munchausen.

Frank Sinatra singing a Moonlight Serenade.

Starflyer 59's Leave Here a Stranger.

Annabel & Keitha, of course.

Dr. Seuss books.



Elisabeth Shue. There's a moment on the LLV soundtrack CD where she says "Don't you like me, Ben?" I could die every time...



A Renoir oil titled In the Meadow.

And Ryuichi Sakamoto's BTTB.

Alex Toth

A comics and animation artist named Alex Toth passed away a day or so ago. If you don't know who that was, Mark Evanier has a quick obit here. Or, to put it another way:

Jennifer Aniston has sexy legs

For those of you that hadn't heard.

Everyone's favorite asshole

I want to say a special shout-out to Paul Gleason, an actor who died today. He was best known for playing...well, see the headline...in a streak of films in the '80s:

• He was the asshole FBI man in Die Hard.
• He was the asshole principal in The Breakfast Club (spoofing himself over 15 years later in Not Another Teen Movie).
• He was the asshole bad guy in Trading Places who meets King (Kong) fate.
• He was even...wait for it...an asshole in a guilty pleasure of mine, Morgan Stewart's Coming Home (my favorite Alan Smithee film!)

So what I'm saying is I, like you, have spent a bunch of hours watching Paul Gleason being taught lessons he richly deserved, and he always made it fun. All kidding aside, I wish him a respectful farewell.

Noah's wife?

Also on Roger Ebert's site today, the following piece of information from a reader:

One of the great ironies of Dan Brown's book is that it assaults you with its greatest piece of idiocy before you've even picked it up. The man's name is Leonardo, please. "da Vinci" (note the lower-case "d"), is NOT his family name, it's his hometown. He was born in Vinci, Italy, in 1452, in a time before Europeans had started surnaming themselves. Brown's error is on par with writing a book on the life of Christ called The Of Nazareth Code, or assuming St. Joan was the daughter of Mr. and Mrs. "Of Arc." It's amazing that anyone could take seriously the historical claims of a work whose title screams out, "penned by an historical ignoramus!"

I looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove reading things like that.

Gore film

And I don't mean "Halloween X: When In Doubt, Blame The Druids," either. Roger Ebert has an article here on Al Gore and his new "Inconvenient Truth" movie. Now, as you know, I don't think Gore is the savior that some in the Democratic blogsphere have convinced themselves he is.

I think a lot of them, on some level, believe that if we can just get Gore in the oval office where he should have been all along, we can magically make it like the past years have never happened.

And it ain't that easy. The list of names responsible for what's happened to this country is long and yes, Republicans make up most of it, with Bush at the top of the tree. But Democrats haven't exactly been covering themselves in glory either and Al Gore is among them.

That said, Ebert makes the film sound better than it looked to me in the trailer.

What he wants you to know is that he has not made a political film. Al Gore's "An Inconvenient Truth" tries to move outside politics and focus on the facts of global warming. Gore says those facts are established, the returns are in, there is almost unanimous scientific agreement about them, and we may have about 10 years before the earth reaches a tipping point from which it cannot recover.

Now that's the kind of talk I like to hear. I like the idea of simply presenting the facts, for which there is overwhelming evidence, and saying This Is The Case. I only wish Democrats would do it about more things.

I've been thinking lately that another of the reasons this blog is not as political as it used to be is for similar reasons: As far as I'm concerned, the facts are in, and in any even reasonably rational universe, virtually the entire Bush administration would be thrown out of the White House.

But I don't have the power to make that happen, and the people who do are extraordinarily unlikely to be listening to me, let alone reading this blog. So I can do lots of posts about what a closed-minded twit George W. Bush is, or I can run pictures of Anne Hathaway.

What would you do?

Ebert further goes on to say of Gore,

He has been traveling the world for six years making speeches in which this message has evolved. But all of those speeches put together have not had the impact of this new documentary, directed by Davis Guggenheim, which is horrifying, enthralling and has the potential, I believe, to actually change public policy and begin a process which could save the earth.

But then, Gore turns around and reminds me of another reason I don't quite trust him.

"...the energy industry has paralyzed America for 20 years with disinformation...They're using exactly the same strategy the tobacco industry used. They're saying there is a 'controversy,' and they refer to a 'debate' when in fact the scientific consensus on global warming is definitive."

Unfortunately, whenever Gore mentions tobacco, I remember things like this:

Six years after Vice President Al Gore's older sister died of lung cancer in 1984, he was still accepting campaign contributions from tobacco interests.

Four years after she died, while campaigning for president in North Carolina, he boasted of his experiences in the tobacco fields and curing barns of his native Tennessee. And it took several years after Nancy Gore Hunger's death for Gore and his parents to stop growing tobacco on their own farms in Carthage, Tenn.

So from where exactly does he get the moral authority to point a finger and say "shame, shame, shame?"

Again-
That said-

I believe he's right about this, and I hope the movie fulfills the potential Ebert believes it has; that would obviously be its greatest success.

But some people think the film is some sort of a shadowy stalking horse for a Gore '08 campaign...and I gotta say, I still hope not.

Tag: The Assassination Game

I got hit by Jen.

I AM: posessed of a silver tongue.
I WANT: to be good, is that not enough?.
I HATE: the Bush administration. For everything they've ever done, basically, but if I had to pick two extremes I'd say:

Squandering an incredible chance to really unify the world and make the losses of 9/11 mean something

And the things they do to the English language.

I MISS: late nights at Lyons or Denny's with George and Turner.
I FEAR: what we've done to our country and our world with this war.
I HEAR: the applause and I hear the bells ...
I WONDER: if I'll ever get my comic romance published.
I REGRET:
I'M NOT: in love.
I DANCE: to Disco, and I don't like rock.
I SING: the Body Electric.
I SEE: a world that no one else can see.
I CRY: for help.
I AM NOT ALWAYS: Anything.
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: pretty girls go to heaven.
I WRITE: about friendships that endure, in a world in which people who are supposed to be together find each other. I'm a fantasist.
I CONFUSE: More than a few people, I've been told.
I NEED: more joy.
I SHOULD: be so lucky, lucky lucky lucky.
I START: with pictures of people.
I FINISH: with this image of Anne Hathaway

...as it's been almost 120 days since I ran one...

I'm tossing this towards Julia, Amee, Bob, Bill, and Tom, in hopes it strikes their fancy.

Good cartoon

You'll find more good cartoons here. Democrats.com publishes a selection every Saturday; that's where I usually get the ones I run.

He said what?

On Media Matters:

On MSNBC's Scarborough Country, Time columnist Joe Klein asserted that former President Bill Clinton will be "a tremendous millstone around [the] neck" of Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton (D-NY) if she runs for president in 2008, adding, "Not because of tomcatting, but because of the fact that he's been president for eight years."

How can eight years of peace and prosperity be a millstone?

Joe Scarborough then observed that a Hillary Clinton presidency would mean "a Bush or Clinton as president or vice president from 1980 to -- I guess it would be 2016," to which Klein replied: "Gag me with a spoon."

Y'know...no one, as witness my post below referencing Mary Stuart Masterson, is a bigger '80s fan than I am. But...even I know it is laughable when discussing presidents or vice-presidents (okay, maybe Quayle), to use "valley girl talk."

Also on Media Matters: Okay, the Enron thing.

In their reporting on the conviction of former Enron Corp. executives Kenneth Lay and Jeffrey Skilling on fraud and conspiracy charges, the network news programs all failed to mention the ties between the fallen corporation and President Bush. Further, the Los Angeles Times ran six separate articles on the Enron verdicts on May 26, but not a single one noted Bush's connection to Enron and, in particular, his close personal and political ties to Lay.

Full story here. You won't want to miss the excerpt from one of then-governor Bush's letters to Kenny-Boy Lay:

One of the sad things about old friends is that they seem to be getting older -- just like you! 55 years old. Wow! That is really old. Thank goodness you have such a young, beautiful wife.

As a certain Mr. Jones' father said on a similar occasion,

if a man cannot manage his native language, how can he manage his native land?

Random Observations Of The '80s Man

This is a woman named Carrie Underwood. I know little about her; a quick Yahoo! search tells me she's an American Idol-winning country singer. But what I wanted to say is: Is she not, at least in the picture above, a dead ringer for Mary Stuart Masterson (below), of Benny & Joon fame?

Say...I haven't run a picture of a pretty girl yet today

That's Sarah Michelle Gellar, who's been looking really good lately, but whose luck in choosing non-Buffy roles does not appear to be getting any better. If reviews of her new movie, "Southland Tales" are anything to go by...

"Southland Tales" is the second film by Richard Kelly, whose "Donnie Darko" made the eyes of film student types roll back in near-orgasm. I have not seen it for precisely that reason.

After working with a bunch of FS types for a year or two, I came to the conclusion that by and large, what they like in their films is not usually what I like in my films.

For example, I like actual human beings.

However, "Darko" was well received by the critics.

This cannot be said for "Southland Tales." Jim Emerson, of Scanners, has put together a rather devastating assortment of reviews, including one by Dave McCoy of MSN Movies which gives this summary of the film:

"Southland Tales" is a broad satire that features The Rock as its lead (he's not bad, actually), Sarah Michelle Gellar as a porn-star idealist (she is bad), folks like Jon Lovitz and Kevin Smith as goofy character actors and Seann William Scott as twins. Oh, and Justin Timberlake narrates the whole thing, and takes time out to do a musical number.

Emerson, who identifies himself as

a big fan of the original version of "Donnie Darko,"

offers this in conclusion:

I do hope he can cut a good movie out of "Southland Tales," and that the film can get an American distributor, but things don't look promising. Most discouraging: On the "Director's Cut" DVD and in "Southland Tales," Kelly keeps company with Kevin Smith, which pretty much marks certain death for any aspirations toward cinematic integrity or ambition (or comedy). And I am never wrong about that.

So, like I say. Haven't seen it. Don't know. But there is part of me that is happy any time a heralded "visionary" crashes and burns.

War! What is it good for? Absolutely nothing!

One. Via Crooks and Liars, Mike Farrell (yes, the fella who played B.J. Hunnicutt on M*A*S*H) on the war in Iraq:

I loathe the people who have created this monstrosity. I want the criminals who lied and cheated and pretended and twisted and perverted reality - and those who rationalized their crimes - so they could send over 2400 servicemen and woman to their death, nearly 18,000 to come home torn - some never to be whole again - thousands more to suffer mental damage, and tens of thousands of innocent Iraqi civilians to be swept into the garbage can of "collateral damage," to pay. These bastards and their apologists should be stripped naked and forced to walk the main streets of America, allowing every city and town that has lost a loved one to injury or death in this shameful catastrophe to heap on them the scorn they deserve.

John F. Kennedy said America would never start a war. Well, it has now, and its architects have damaged our character, poisoned our standing in the world and soiled the soul of what was once the greatest nation in the history of the world.

Two. Glenn Greenwald on the now-confirmed Haditha massacre:

...what incidents of this type do underscore is that wars are not something that are to be routine or casual tools in foreign policy. The outright eagerness and excitement for more and more wars that we see so frequently from some circles is not only unseemly and ugly unto itself -- although it is that -- but it is also so reckless and unfathomably foolish. Every war spawns countless enemies, entails incidents which severely undermine a nation's credibility and moral standing, ensures that the ugliest and most violent actions will be undertaken in the country's name, and, even in the best of cases, wreaks unimaginable human suffering and destruction.

Three. Say it again!

You know, this is actually remarkably soothing

Enjoy.








Link via the Friday Funnies at TalkLeft, where it says that

...this is the most popular screen-saver in the U.S. (If he gets stuck, just move him with your cursor or right-click and press play.)

Okay, now, I suppose I can live with Qui-Gon Jinn...

Even if he was in one of the bad movies, he was a pretty good character...although y'know, that whole "we have to leave your mother in slavery, Anakin" thing didn't do much for his hero status.

And my top match from one of the good films is Han Solo, so who's gonna complain about that?

But Jar Jar Binks really hurts.

Your results:You are Qui-Gon Jinn

Overall, you're a pretty well balanced person. But maybe you focus a little too much on the here and now. Think about the future before it's too late.

Qui-Gon Jinn 64%
Han Solo 62%
Jar Jar Binks 62%
C-3PO 60%
Luke Skywalker 59%
Darth Maul 59%
Lando Calrissian 56%
Yoda 55%
Jabba the Hutt 54%
Obi-Wan Kenobi 53%

This list displays the top 10 results out of a possible 21 characters)

Click here to take the "Which Star Wars character are you?" quiz...

More good news for any "Star Wars" fans left who still believed George Lucas cared about them

You know how you shelled out good money to buy the "special edition" DVDs of the classic trilogy, and then he announced he was gonna release the originals? Well, it gets better. They're not even gonna be letter-boxed.

You know what what that means; it means he'll still have yet another version to release and take your money at least one more time.

I gotta say, part of me is really enjoying the fact that Lucas is basically peeing on the floor and smashing the fans faces into it at this point. It's not often you see a filmmaker who so many hero-worship so openly disdain the people who made him his money.

But then, I wouldn't respect most anyone who thought episode III didn't suck either.

How true!

Robertson: Islam is a "Christian heresy," Jews are "very thrifty, extraordinarily good business people"
On The 700 Club, host Pat Robertson said "Islam is essentially a Christian heresy" that "picked up snippets of the gospels," and other Biblical texts and is now taking "everything that Jesus said" and "transport[ing it] into this fictional Mahdi." Robertson also perpetuated Jewish stereotypes in a discussion about the need for Israeli soup kitchens, stating that "When you think of Jewish people, you think of successful businessmen" who are "very wise in finance and who are prosperous." Robertson later added that "[i]t shocks people" to find out "there's poverty in Israel," because "Jewish people" are "very thrifty" and "extraordinarily good business people."

2006, ladies and gentlemen. We're living in the year 2006.

...well, you and I are. Mr. Robertson is apparently living in the 1950s.

Happy birthday, baby

Or, "Self-indulgent, yes, but it's my blog." When I was writing the last revision of My Girlfriend's Boyfriend, I finally nailed down something I'd been wanting to for a while: When exactly is Keitha's birthday?

Those of you who have read it know that one or two things in the storyline center on that date, and although I didn't think I was going to state it in the text (and I still don't), I wanted to pin it to a specific one, just in my own mind.

The date I picked-as if you're all not already way ahead of me-is today, May 25th.

Why May? I wanted a day around this time of year because of some other things that happen in the plot that are tied to real time (like when the gay parade is in San Francisco, for example). Why the 25th? Well, not because of any astrological signifigance that I am aware of (and I wouldn't have changed it for that either one way or another if it did).

I chose it because today is also

Towel Day...celebrated every May 25 as a tribute by fans of the late author Douglas Adams.

If it's good enough to tribute Douglas Adams, it's good enough for Keitha. So if you know any spiky, playful girls (as Corey recently dubbed her), buy them a drink today and tell them Keitha says hi.

Even if they sleep with boys.

Keitha: What's all this "baby" business?
Annabel: Sweetie, it's a nice gesture...

I kinda like this. I don't know why.

Oh look. Rocks.

Another one of them there Meme type things

I intercepted this from someone named Alison, whose blog I stumbled over via a Technorati search.

10 Favorites
Favorite Season: Huff, season one. But surely that's not what you meant. Probably winter.
Favorite Color: Green. Fieldy green
Favorite Time: Heavenly shades of night are...
Favorite Food: Special K.

Favorite Drink: Well, lately, I've been enjoying the filtered water. Also Gatorade.
Favorite Ice Cream: Ben & Jerry's vanilla-carmel.
Favorite Place: Someplace I'm safe and warm and can see a beautiful vista.
Favorite Sport: That's funny.
Favorite Actor: Geez, do I have one? The entire male half of the original West Wing ensemble. Or Hank Azaria.
Favorite Actress: Again, hard to name one, but you're not gonna go too far wrong with anyone who was employed on an Aaron Sorkin series. If by "favorite" you're going for cheer likablity, though, it might have to be Alyson Hannigan, who has an unbelivable ability to get an audience on her side.

9 Currents
Current Feeling: My leg is stiff and it's hot in here.
Current Drink: none.
Current Time: 8:31 PM
Current Show on TV: None.
Current Mobile used: None.
Current Windows Open: Bathroom window.
Current Underwear: White, Jockey
Current Clothes: Green plaid shirt, jeans, socks
Current Thought: What am I currently thinking?

8 Firsts
First Nickname: Benjy
First Kiss: Jennifer.
First Crush: A girl named Heather on an old PBS show titled Zoom.
First Best Friend: I don't remember, sadly.
First Vehicle I Drove: Tan Camry LE.
First Job: Video store clerk, Tower Video
First Date: I can't remember.
First Pet: a black cat named Frisky.

7 Lasts
Last Drink: milk
Last Kiss: a goodbye kiss to a crazy but fun girl before she drove away
Last Meal: Peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich
Last Web Site Visited: Yahoo! Seatch
Last Movie Watched: The Beatles, "Help!"
Last Phone Call: My mother, who had her car stolen yesterday and found today.
Last TV show Watched: If we're counting on DVD, Sports Night. If we're not, a Married...with Children rereun on F/X. Meaningless observation: Both shows featured Ted McGinley.

6 Have You Ever...
Have You Ever Broken the Law: yes
Have You Ever Been Drunk: yes
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: yes
Have You Ever Been in the Middle/Close to Gunfire: no
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: no
Have You Ever Broken Anyone's Heart: Probably, but I didn't know I was doing it at the time.

5 Things
Things You Can Hear Right Now: The hum of my computer, cars passing.
Things On Your Bed: too much-and my fuzzy gray cat, Siousxie.
Things You Ate Today: Special K, aforemenentioned sandwich, fruit snacks, cheese balls.
Things You Do When You Are Bored: Read, watch tv, or something else

4 Places You Have Been Today
Scarecrow video
My apartment
My mother's apartment
In this chair

3 Things On Your Desk Right Now
An old Mac I keep just for the eccentricity
A laser printer
My fuzzy orange cat, Donovan

2 Choices
Salt or Pepper: salt
Hot or Cold: Cool

1 Place You Want To Visit
Ireland

More Dixie Chicks, or I don't know about you, but I like the sound of the truth coming from their mouths

Atrios has video of the Letterman appearance I mentioned earlier this afternoon. It's worth watching even if you've already heard the studio version of their new "Not Ready To Make Nice" song; superior in some ways.

Blue Sky

You Are Sky Blue

Dreamy and creative, you the potential in everyone ... and everything! And while you strive to have an ideal life, you are pretty mellow about it. You know your time will come.

What Color Blue Are You?

Wow...a heh heh...a heh heh heh heh heh...

So! Tom Delay. You remember him, he's the indicted republican...one of them. Former House Majority Leader. Classy guy, Godly fellow who tried to change the rules to benefit himself and his friends. Especially himself.

Well...

This morning, DeLay’s legal defense fund sent out a mass email criticizing the movie “The Big Buy: Tom DeLay’s Stolen Congress,” by “Outfoxed” creator Robert Greenwald.

The email features a “one-pager on the truth behind Liberal Hollywood’s the Big Buy,”

Before I tell you what the lead item is in that "one-pager" (no peeking, now!), I'd like to remind you of something I wondered about back when we were all talking about Stephen Colbert's performance at the dinner.

I said:

What interests me more than the question of Colbert's goal is what was the expectation of whoever offered him the job? I can hardly believe this is true, but...do you suppose someone saw a few episodes of his show and...didn't realize he was being ironic?

Well, Ben of last month...believe it. The lead item in that defense of Delay ...

...is Colbert’s interview with Greenwald on Comedy Central (where Colbert plays a faux-conservative, O’Reilly-esque character).

DeLay thinks Colbert is so persuasive, he’s now featuring the full video of the interview at the top of the legal fund’s website. And why not? According to the email, Greenwald “crashed and burned” under the pressure of Colbert’s hard-hitting questions, like “Who hates America more, you or Michael Moore?”

Amazing.

I've said it before and I'll say it again

I'm not voting for a Democrat in 2006 or 2008 unless one shows up. Let me explain what I mean by "a Democrat."

Unfortunately, Glenn Greenwald reminds me, such Democrats don't exist unless embodied by Martin Sheen.

The same paralyzing, stagnating, fatally passive Democratic voices who always counsel against standing up to the administration aren't going anywhere. It is not hard to imagine what they will be saying:

President Bush is a lame duck who is out in 2008, and so it doesn't matter what he got away with or what he did. Conducting investigations into these intelligence and ”anti-terrorist” scandals will be depicted as obstructionist and weak on national security, and will jeopardize our chances to re-take the White House and will cost us House and Senate seats. It is best to look forward, not to the past, and not be seen as conducting vendettas against the lame duck President. What matters is taking the White House in 2008 and so there is no reason to attack the President on these matters of the past.

Is there any doubt that the likes of Senators Feinstein, Rockefeller, Levin, etc. are going to follow that thinking, as they always do? I don't see how that can be doubted. I think Congressional Democrats will be more cautious and passive, not less so, if they take over one of the Congressional houses in 2006. People who operate from a place of fear and excess caution become even more timid and fearful when they have something to lose. [Emphasis mine-BV] The Democratic Congressional Chairs are going to be desperate not to lose that newfound power, and they will be very, very vulnerable to the whiny whispers of the consultant class that they should not spend their time and energy investigating this administration or vigorously opposing them on national security matters.

Digby joins in the discussion here:

Glenn goes on to speculate about the future and sees that there is not likely to be a whole lot of action on these matters going forward, even if we win. And that is my great fear, too. The Democrats have the GOP snake by the neck but I'm pretty sure they don't have the nerve to kill it. And that is a huge mistake as has been demonstrated over and over again for the last 30 years.

He further links to an article by Robert Parry:

My book, Secrecy & Privilege, opens with a scene in spring 1994 when a guest at a White House social event asks Bill Clinton why his administration didn’t pursue unresolved scandals from the Reagan-Bush era, such as the Iraqgate secret support for Saddam Hussein’s government and clandestine arms shipments to Iran.

Clinton responds to the questions from the guest, documentary filmmaker Stuart Sender, by saying, in effect, that those historical questions had to take a back seat to Clinton’s domestic agenda and his desire for greater bipartisanship with the Republicans.

Clinton’s generosity to George H.W. Bush and the Republicans, of course, didn’t turn out as he had hoped. Instead of bipartisanship and reciprocity, he was confronted with eight years of unrelenting GOP hostility, attacks on both his programs and his personal reputation.

Clinton’s failure to expose that real history also led indirectly to the restoration of Bush Family control of the White House in 2001. Despite George W. Bush’s inexperience as a national leader, he drew support from many Americans who remembered his father’s presidency fondly.

Not only did Clinton inadvertently clear the way for the Bush restoration, but the Right’s political ascendancy wiped away much of the Clinton legacy, including a balanced federal budget and progress on income inequality. A poorly informed American public also was easily misled on what to do about U.S. relations with Iraq and Iran.

Only a fool keeps feeding the mad dog that bit his hand.

I am not voting for a single Democrat in 2006 or 2008 unless one shows up.

Another reason to like John McCain, the "good" republican

He's a master of subtle nuance. Via Ezra Klein:

Brendan Nyhan reports on John McCain's bold plan to end the violence in Iraq:

"One of the things I would do if I were President would be to sit the Shiites and the Sunnis down and say, 'Stop the bullshit,'" said Mr. McCain, according to Shirley Cloyes DioGuardi, an invitee, and two other guests.

Woo! That's bracing stuff! And then, after the hasty consultations with translators to make sure he actually said that, the participants would stare at him quizzically, wondering what the straight-talk solution to oil sharing, political representation, entrenched hatreds, and varying conceptions of secularism will be. So what is it? McCain demands that they "stop the bullshit." What are his next ten words?

Cover me

BagNewsNotes has an entry analysing Time's cover story on The Dixie Chicks (who, BTW, gave a very powerful performance on Letterman the other night). I've read the story, I think it does at least as much to make country music fans look bad as the Chicks. It concedes-though it's buried fairly deep-that the Chicks have long-since been proved right, but says they still look bad to country music fans.

Why? Well, see if you can follow this (I can't). It's not because Natalie remarked that she wished the Pres. was from another state than hers. It's because (it says) she did it from a stage in the U.K., the old "foreign soil" attack that's never made much sense to me.

If you don't like your President critisized, that's one thing. I don't agree, but it's one thing. But I've never understood why where he's critisized should matter. I didn't understand it when George Bush, Sr. was trying to smear Clinton by saying he led anti-Vietnam war demonstrations while a student...in England (the horror) and I don't understand it now.

As Maines says in the story, she said it in the U.K. because that's where they were the week the war started (I'm envious-I was in Knoxville). I'm left with the conclusion that frankly, where Maines made her statement doesn't really matter.

On some level, country music fans must know that. It's just that, put simply, country music fans don't like strong women. I have no patience for people like that. Apparently, neither do the Chicks, which may explain why they've gassed up their car and headed out of town.



Excuse me-my ride is here...

A declaration of cease-fire

Good afternoon. In the past, this blogger has had some unkind things to say about Madonna. I have implied, in so many words, that she was a bit pathetic, and emotionally disengaged as a musician to boot. And not even that attractive anymore.

However. A fella named Glen Beck, of CNN, recently went on his show and had these things to say:

"Gee Madonna why would you think theres too much filth on TV? (he plays her
videos for like a virgin and American pie) Look at this I'm not even sure but I think I'm getting crabs just from watching this, really in fact if youre at home grab some penicillin, swallow
it otherwise youre gonna be peeing cookie dough tomorrow."

"Do you remember when Madonna made out with Britney spears at the vmas apparently that confused her daughter Lordes, which is a stupid name, she asked her mom she said "mom are you gay?" Madonna's response in that fake British accent "I am the mummy pop star and
she is the baby pop star and I am kissing her to pass my energy on to her." By energy, Madonna if you mean cold sours then yeah youre probably right."

Here are a few other things Beck has had to say recently, which should explain why I don't even want to be in the neighborhood of agreeing with him. He's a war-mongering, Democratic progressive-left bashing, sexist racist.

So: This blog is now a Madonna-bashing-free zone.

I will do my best to think of her, not as the...frankly kind of pathetic, emotionally disengaged musically, not even all-that-attractive person that she has become. Rather, as the comical sprite of action, overflowing with emotion, charm and beauty she must once have been.



I will take the position from here on out that if I cannot say something nice, I will not say anything at all.

About Madonna, that is. Bill O'Reilly, George Bush and Rush Limbaugh are all still fair game, although much less likely to have me run pictures of them naked.

Thank you for your attention; go about your day.

I don't have much to add, but it should be noted

...that former Democratic Sen. Lloyd Bentsen died today. I'm sure you all remember him for the same thing I do; one of the great sound-bites of the '80s.

Can't...resist...must make...cheap shot...

Mariah Carey explains, in pantomine, a part of the secret of her success.



Via Dlisted.

I have these things to say about tonight's season finale of "24" (no spoilers)

1. YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES!

2. Called it!

3. Oh, shit...but Corey, you'll be happy.

Uh-oh.

NBC Contemplates Schedule Shuffle

NBC Entertainment President Kevin Reilly says he may make changes to his fall prime time schedule, with rumors swirling about the network moving Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip to Monday at 9 or 10.

It's going to be opposite 24, I just know it.

Corey, shut up.

After ABC moved Grey's Anatomy to the Thursday 9 p.m. time slot that NBC had slated for its highly anticipated Studio 60, sources familiar with the situation say NBC is contemplating moving the Aaron Sorkin-penned show to Mondays at 9. However, those sources also say that show executives are pushing for a 10 p.m. time period.

Such a move would free up an hour for NBC on Thursdays. Options would include moving up shows previously slated for midseason, including The Apprentice or a block of comedies which could include Scrubs and rookie The Singles Table.

-- Broadcasting & Cable

And one more for the road: Words to live by

From How To Write A Damn Good Novel, by James N. Frey:

You can kill the spell of identification just as easily as you can create it-if you lose the reader's sympathy for the character. You can lose reader sympathy by having your character commit acts of cruelty to another character with whom the readers identify more strongly or for whom they have strong sympathy. You can lose reader sympathy by having the character make dumb choices-acting at less than maximum capacity. The idiot in the horror story who responds to creepy noises by going into the attic armed only with a candle is an example. You can lose reader sympathy when a character seems too ordinary, is stereotyped, or doesn't struggle hard enough. The reader wants to cheer a fighter, not witness a milquetoast wallowing in, say, self-pity.

South Carolina: We'd Like To Be Known As Even Stupider Than Tennessee

S.C. Girl Protests Confederate Apparel Ban

Great day in the morning

I hate to tell you this, miss, but we can see right through your dress.

Actress and model Phoebe Price arrives for the screening of 'The Wind That Shakes the Barley,' at the 59th International film festival in Cannes, southern France, on Thursday, May 18, 2006. (AP Photo/Francois Mori)

Via ONTD.

A quick word for the producers of "Huff," should they be looking in

Guys and gals...

You can't have a character listening to a tape recording of a conversation that took place in the previous episode...and then have the recording show noticable differences to what was shown in that episode!

You especially can't do it when you have a show that is re-run several times a week, and is also accessable On Demand. Unfortunately, this is what you have done by showing Huff listening to a recording of his Ecstasy-fueled therapy session, but eliminating several of the dramatic pauses Azaria took. Adding a few lines of dialogue that were not in the scene last week, to boot.

It don't work.

This show is still hanging on to my interest by its fingernails, mainly by virtue of the acting, particuarly Azaria's, and whatever residual caring I still have for the characters.

And to follow up on my comments about Beth's flirtation with The L Word last week...well, they're still going after that dollar, they just didn't use her for it this week.

Which is actually kind of why I was upset about it. It wasn't that I minded the scene or was offended by it. It was just that I knew, with absolute certainty based on the way they've been handling that character this year, that there would be no follow-up on it.

This year Beth is all about faddism. She shows an interest in prayer and church...for a few episodes. Suddenly she's doing heart-pounding, shallow-breathing kissing with another woman...and the next episode it's as if it never happened.

None of the questions are raised that might be. Not even the obvious ones, let alone those I might have expected from last season's writing.

Last season I lost count of the number of episodes that made me tear up by the end. No matter how many times I saw them. This season that's turned into a sad, resigned sigh...when it's not an annoyed grunt.

Here's irony for ya: Huff's expressions of discontent with his marriage...have begun to sound echoic of my dissatisfaction with this series.

As I say, that's irony for ya.

Dear Madonna: The '70s are over. The '70s revival...

...is over. Even That '70's Show is over. You might want to let your costume people know.