I mostly like Al Franken

I like his book Lies. I like his radio show-but more, I liked the televised version Sundance used to air. On the other hand, when Sundance aired what was supposed to be a victory celebration on election day '04 (and we all know how that turned out) it was one of the saddest things I've ever seen. On the other other hand, he annoys Bill O'Reilly, which is the most noble task ere given to man.

So I mostly like him. And I liked this thoughtful interview in which he discusses a forthcoming documentary about him (which I'll probably also like) and the possibility that he'll run for office in 2008.

Excerpts:

...[the Republicans] continue to make a lot of mistakes. There's still the profound lack of intellectual honesty and seriousness—in the way they approach the war, in the way they talk to Americans, in the way they approach the rest of the world. That hurts us every single day.

I get angry, too—especially when it has to do with the troops. These guys [in the White House] seem to be very blithely willing to risk other people's lives and then completely disrespect [the troops] on top of it.

First sign of a dumb rule

George Bush on how he responds to his critics:

Asked on Tuesday how he would respond to critics who equate his defence of Mr Rumsfeld with ignoring the military, Mr Bush said: "I'm the decider and I decide what is best. And what's best is for Don Rumsfeld to remain as the secretary of defence."

Via Echidine, who adds

Reminds me of those t-shirts which say "Because I'm the mummy, that's why." Or the daddy in this case, perhaps.

PS: So he's the decider, is he? Reminds me of two things: The high priests Annas and Caiphas plotting to crucify Jesus in a song called "Then We Are Decided" in Jesus Christ Superstar.

And here's another one for the Doctor Who fans: Who remembers Full Circle?

"Hey, pay attention back there! Kang is talking!"

The link that remolded the web: Marvel Superheroes Secret Wars reenactors.

"Look, at no point in the series does the Hulk ever fight Dr. Octopus! Might as well have him fight Fin Fang Foom!"

"Fin Fang Foom wasn't in Secret Wars."

"My point exactly!"

Little dreamer, you're the DJ of your soul

You Are a Red Flower

A red flower tends to represent power, seduction, and desire. At times, you are loving like a red tulip. And at other times, you're very enthusiastic, like a bouvardia. And more than you wish, your passion is a bit overwhelming, like a red rose.

What Color Flower Are You?

Timely "Legal"

There's been a lot of talk of vaginas around this blog of late. First we discovered that the good Reverend Donald Wildmon's press people can't even bring themselves to type the word. Then Egalia taught us all that the mere possession of such an item instantly confers on one an inherent superiority to any and all possessors of a penis, whomever they may be.

Then to my surprise and delight, a subplot on "Boston Legal" tonight dealt with an idiotic lawyer ending a relationship with a beautiful, bright woman because she freely and frequently used the term.

This woman.

When I say idiot, I mean idiot.

Sing your life

Misty, via Shakespeare's Sister, asks:

What song (or up to three for a mini-soundtrack) currently describes your life?

Waiting For My Real Life To Begin (Colin Hay)

Time Will Tell (The Twins)

Field Work (Ryuichi Sakamoto/Thomas Dolby)

Oh. My. God.

This is going to be one of those posts that I feel compelled to start out by saying: I am absolutely not making this up. One or two of you may remember the Abstinence Clearinghouse, which, as it sounds, is a group that promotes saving sex for marriage.

I wrote about them late last year when they had the bright idea of merchandising cherry-flavored (I am not kidding) lollypops with "just say no to sex" messages on the stem.

But that was just kind of stupid, mostly, and also a little bit funny.

This is not funny.

The Abstinence Clearinghouse also sponsors something they call "the Father-Daughter Purity Ball."

Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

The "Father-Daughter Purity Ball" is a dance, you see, like a prom. Only at the end of this one, the girls recite a pledge to their "dates"....their fathers.

Digby says:

You have to see it to believe it. They are all dressed up like prom goers, the dads in tuxes and the daughters in evening gowns looking all grown up. They dance, they laugh, they giggle. And then father and daughter stand up, holding each others hands, staring into each others' eyes and the girls make these vows as if in a wedding ceremony.

The pledge goes a little something like this.

I pledge to remain sexually pure...until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my husband. ... I know that God requires this of me.. that he loves me. and that he will reward me for my faithfulness.

Already, creepy enough, right? Wait, there's more. These are not 15 or 16 or 17 year old girls I'm talking about here, no no. This is what I'm talking about, in an actual picture from one of the balls.
As Digby also says, in a separate post:

I can understand why the little girls would want to do this. It's a chance to dress up and spend time with their father. If it were for another purpose, it might be sweet.

But instead, it's unspeakably corrupt.

This upsets me more than words can say.

Okay, Spade, I'll give you that one

As a rule, I like David Spade only slightly more than I like Rob Schneider. But there are occasional exceptions; I thought he gave a very likable vocal performance in The Emperor's New Groove, for example.

And this made me laugh...

"The National Enquirer has reported that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were married eight months ago by a chaplain in the Church of Scientology. The groom wore a casual linen suit while the bride wore an expression of slowly-awakening terror."
---David Spade on The Showbiz Show

-Via Daily Kos

Just when you thought The Colbert Report couldn't get any better

Not only do they reference one of the coolest videos of all time-The Cars "Magic"-but Rik-bloody-Ocasek appears and smacks down Todd Rundgren, currently touring as lead singer for the "New Cars."

Red Eye

This was my first extended look at Rachel McAdams in action. There are those-indeed, many-who think she's quite the hottie. I don't quite see it myself; no argument she's attractive, but for me personally there's something missing.

Or maybe it was just this role. I liked the film generally and McAdams certainly does a more than capable acting job in it, but her character makes too quick a change for the last act. As it happens, that last act is when I started liking her character (and the movie) a lot more, so I was okay with it while I was watching it. But sitting here, now, I wish her characterization could have been a little less plot-driven...and the plot a little more character-driven.

But, that's probably not a wholly fair thing to ask from a thriller, that's not what it's trying to be, anyway. As a thriller, Red Eye works well; the tension is neatly sustained with little or no gratuitious violence.

And I'm a sucker for "woman fighting back with smarts" stories anyway. One thing happened in the denouement that I wish they'd avoided; I won't reveal what, but it's not enough to capsize the movie. Hell, even a show as smartly written as Veronica Mars was its first season didn't avoid this particular trap.

If you see it, keep an eye on an actress named Jayma Mays, who plays Cynthia, a coworker of McAdams' character. The two have some nice "female bonding" moments throughout. I know nothing about her-this is apparently her major credit to date-but again, just to my personal taste, she is more of a sweetheart than the film's star.

(It says here she comes from Virginia, worked with Tim Busfield of The West Wing in the theatre, and "has appeared on the Los Angeles stage in several plays, including a production of “The Rocky Horror Picture Show,” in which she played the lead role of Janet." This explains everything.)

What's My Line?

The UK has done another one of those polls, this time to determine their favorite (single-line) song lyrics. U2 have come in at number one with this line from, drearily enough, "One:"

"One life, with each other, sisters, brothers"

Also in the top 20: The Smiths, Nirvana, Marvin Gaye, U2 again, Bowie, and The Police.

So, as you can well imagine, this started me thinking about a list of my own...which follows in no particular order:

My Favorite-Homeless Club Kids. "The ghosts of dead teenagers sing to me while I am dancing."

Bobby Darin-Simple Song Of Freedom. "No doubt some folks enjoy doin' battle, like presidents, prime ministers and kings, so let's all build them shelves so they can fight among themselves."

Pop Will Eat Itself-Can U Dig it? "We like the music, we like the disco sound...hey!"

Glass Tiger-Thin Red Line. "Red is for the heroes; green is for the brave; soldiers would you leave me with no souls to save?"

Howard Jones-New Song. "Don't crack up, bend your brain, see both sides, throw off your mental chains!"

Joe Jackson-It's Different For Girls. "You're all the same..."

Joe Jackson-Steppin' Out. "But nothing hides the color of the lights that shine..."

Tears For Fears-Shout. “If I could change your mind, I'd really love to break your heart”

Culture Club-Move Away. "I never wanted to be a hero; I never wanted to be a man"

Pet Shop Boys-It Couldn't Happen Here. "All dignity and injured innocence"

Human League-Love Action (I Believe In Love). "I believe in truth, though I lie a lot"

Kirsty MacColl-Don't Go Home. "Nowhere was mine, no one was home"

Kirsty MacColl-As Long As You Hold Me. "As long as you need me I will try not to die"

The Beatles-Strawberry Fields Forever. "It’s getting hard to be someone but it all works out...it doesn’t matter much to me."

A sobering post before 11 o'clock in the morning

Billmon gives a possible explaination for the United States' reported plans to attack Iran. And it ain't too damn good.

What we are witnessing (through rips in the curtain of official secrecy) may be an example of what the Germans call the flucht nach vorne – the "flight forward." This refers to ta situation in which an individual or institution seeks a way out of a crisis by becoming ever more daring and aggressive (or, as the White House propaganda department might put it: "bold") A familar analogy is the gambler in Vegas, who tries to get out of a hole by doubling down on each successive bet.

Classic historical examples of the flucht nach vornes include Napoleon's attempt to break the long stalemate with Britain by invading Russia,the decision of the Deep South slaveholding states to secede from the Union after Lincoln's election, and Milosevic's bid to create a "greater Serbia" after Yugoslavia fell apart.

As these examples suggest, flights forward usually don't end well – just as relatively few gamblers emerge from a doubling-down spree with their shirts still on their backs.

Read more. And give thanks to If I Ran the Zoo for the link.

And now, "Poetry Corner"

Okay, the "Generals speaking out against the vile Rumsfeld" thing, about which you may have heard. I think columnist Madeleine Begun Kane sums it up best...

Some Gen'rals are filling our ears,
With Rummy critiques and Bronx cheers.
What a shame they're so late,
And didn't join the debate
Before Bush got another four years.

Good news for people with vaginas

Got a comment from Egalia to an earlier post. She writes:

...the fact is people with penises continue to rule the church, the state, the corporation, ETC., and the world is a friggin mess. Both fairness and sanity suggest the world might be a better/warmer/saner place if people with vaginas get their turn.

This just in...

Cathy Guisewhite is automatically a better cartoonist than was Charles Schulz, because she has a vagina.

The L Word is automatically a better show than Huff or the first four years of West Wing because it's written by more people with vaginas than they are/were.

For that matter, Anna Faris is a better actor than Hank Azaria, because she has a vagina, and he does not.

Amy Ephron is a better novelist than Gregory McDonald-again, because of that whole vagina thing.

Mary J. Blige is a better singer/songwriter than Colin Hay. You know why? Vagina.

Paris flickin-Hilton is of more value, and stands a better chance of making this world a better/saner/warmer place than Muhammed Ali. She has a vagina too, after all (in case you hadn't heard).

Oh, and Margaret Cho is a more important comedian than Richard Pryor. Can you guess why?

In closing, I'm going to repeat something I said in replying to Egalia's comment:

What's between people's ears is more important than what's between their legs.

And thank you and goodnight.

Gay families screwed by White House at Easter Egg Roll

To shock and horror of all.

Every day is Breast Appreciation Day

An e-mail controversy has some people calling for the resignation of an elected official in Bucks County.

Republican Warminster Township Supervisor Fred Gold distributed the e-mail. Gold sent an e-mail picturing a topless woman to other township employees. It was sent back in January, but then photocopies started popping up earlier this month.

The e-mail supposedly celebrates the fictional holiday of National Breast Appreciation Day on Jan. 15. Accompanying the photo of the topless woman is the message "Beats the **** out of Martin Luther King Day doesn't it."

I don't know which I like more; the fact that this silly SOB thought this was a witticism he needed to share with his employees...or that the news story quoted felt the need to tell its readers this was a fictional holiday.

Oh good, I was hoping someone would post this so I could link it

Via Cartoon Brew, very funny Disney parody from last night's Saturday Night Live. Just what else is kept in "The Disney Vault?" One of the jokes you'll see coming-frozen Walt, ha ha-but it goes just a little bit further than that...

The Aristocrats

Directors Paul Provenza and Penn Jillette make a point in their commentary-which is surprisingly thought-provoking considering it's for a movie that consists of nothing but putting two cameras down (at most) and shooting people talking: This is about comedy as jazz.

As you've probably heard, what they did is take an old joke that every comedian seems to know and filmed about 100 comedians telling or commenting on or talking about it. It's a long, highly filthy joke with lots of room to riff and put your own personal stamp on, and they do. It's just about watching a bunch of different minds playing with the same concept.

You can see who can absolutely fly with it and who falls flat on their face (that will of course be a matter of taste) And since some of the minds are brilliant comic performers-

Hank Azaria seems to create a whole character (complete with backstory) just for the one joke.

Drew Carey insists that a physical bit of business is required to sell the punchline, something which seems to come as news to most of the other comedians.

Carlin, of course-another point Provenza makes in the commentary is that there are very few comedians he likes to listen to talk about the technique of comedy; Carlin is certainly one of 'em as far as I'm concerned (Provenza also mentions Paul Reiser and Larry Miller). It's like listening to Sinatra talking about singing...

Andy Richter lovingly tells the joke to his infant child...

After the first few times you hear the joke, you'll find, what kills you in the re-tellings is the little "licks" the players throw in. Steven Wright, among others, questioning the very reality of the joke, like "Wait...why would the man say that?"

Why would the man say what? Well, lemme tell you. A man walks into a talent agent's office, see, with his family, and he says, Have I got an act for you!

...oh just see the movie. In time, the actual content of the "Aristocrats" joke stops mattering because this is really a tribute to comedy and the way a comedy mind works.

40-Year-Old Virgin

I rented a few movies I've been wanting to see for the weekend...

You know, the thing about this one is that cast, directed or written wrong it could have been so mean, but it isn't, it's genuinely funny and "adult" without being "raunchy" in bad way. Actually it is raunchy, but in a good way.

This one is for the Doctor Who fans

John Nathan-Turner is alive and well and doing costume and set design for Mariah Carey.

Rad, trad, and dangerous to know

Glenn Greenwald has a post about the latest attempt to paint a vulgar picture of the liberal blogsphere, of which Dictionopolis in Digitopolis is a small and not very influential part. I recommend reading it in full, but the short version is that once again, someone dug down deep to find the most fringy and cringe-worthy comments from the left. Then labeled them representative, without noticing that the big boys on the right-people who actually are influential and representative- say worse every day, and have for years.

The Right's best-selling author calls liberals traitors and urges that they be beaten with baseball bats and attacked with bombs. Its most popular radio talk show host -- with his 20 million daily followers -- has spent the last 20 years urging that liberals be deported and praising the kidnappings of his political opponents, while other favorites on Right-wing radio routinely call for the imprisonment of leading Democrats. Similarly, some of the Right's favorite commentators have urged that those who espouse liberalism be tried for sedition, or worse.

And how fondly I recall these sentiments from Sen. Jesse Helms during the Clinton years:

In an effort to dampen the furor over his Commander-in-Chief remarks, on November 22 Helms told a newspaper reporter from his home state of North Carolina that the President should be careful about visiting military bases in that state. "Mr. Clinton better watch out of he comes down here," Helms said. "He better have a bodyguard."

Can one even contemplate the reaction if a Democratic Senator today warned George Bush to avoid military bases becasue he would likely be physically attacked by a military that hated him? Granted, those threats against the President were merely from a leading Republican Senator, not from an anonymous commenter on a blog, but...

Mystery homophobic (but pro-sexual abuse) irrelevant religious figurine theatre 3000

Pope Benedict XVI had some things to say during Good Friday observances in Rome recently. He said:

"Lord, we have lost our sense of sin,"

How true. The deadliest sins are said to include avarice or greed, sines "we" clearly have no sense of whatsoever. Then there's envy and lust, which I'm guessing for this pope's followers equals this. And of course sloth-I think you know that we here in the United States dislike sloth, and would never go so far as to make a sloth a movie star or anything.
His holiness also remarked:

"Today a slick campaign of propaganda is spreading an inane apologia of evil

But enough about the conservative republican blogs.

a senseless cult of Satan, a mindless desire for transgression, a dishonest and frivolous freedom, exalting impulsiveness, immorality and selfishness as if they were new heights of sophistication.”

You don't win anything for guessing who I'm sure the pontiff was thinking of. Some poor misguided souls are putting it about that he meant his comments as an attack on gay families, but that can't be right. Why would the symbol of doing good works on earth so that you might be rewarded in heaven so needlessly and wrongfully hurt people on these, his most holiest of days?

I mean, if he were the sort of person who'd do that, he'd be a miserable maggot-ridden scumsucker who deserves to die immidately and burn in hell's fire for the rest of eternity.

But of course, he's the pope, so he's not.

Happy Easter, everybody.

ETA-If I were a credulous, superstitious fool, this sort of thing might worry me: Literally moments after I first posted the above, it began to hail like a mofo here in Seattle.

Fortunately, I'm not.

There's everything in this show, everything that fits, from "The Bright Side Of Life" to girls with great big...

Courtesy of our man Mark Evanier, a little more than one minute of Monty Python's Spamalot, complete with one or two quick shots of Hank Azaria in outfits that ought to keep "Huff" in therapy for years...

And on the flip side of the Reverend coin

Contrasting with the scarred, tails side representing the likes of the Reverend Wildmon below, we have an interview with the Rev. William Sloane Coffin, recently deceased, representing the shiny, heads side.

It's on NPR from 1985 and is well worth listening to.

One of these days I'm going to write "The Penis Arias"

And when I do, I'll bet the Rev. Donald Wildmon will be able to speak the title aloud with a smile on his face and a song in his heart. Which isn't the case with The Vagina Monologues, which title the Reverend's AgapePress can't even bring themselves to type.

Seriously. Via Pam's House Blend, in an AgapePress report about protests of the play being performed on the Notre Dame campus, it is referred to throughout as The V Monologues. Because vagina is a bad word.

Of course, should this prove to be a production in which the lead roles are taken by Jane Badler, Faye Grant, Jennifer Cooke and June Chadwick, that would be entirely different.

(Come on...I know Bill Sherman gets it, anybody else?)

Every day, it's-a-gettin' closer

So there's a fella named Richard Ben-Veniste. He was the Commissioner of the 9/11 Commission. NewsMax and Powerline-type Republican conservatives don't like him because he acted like he actually wanted the truth.

See, he's the fella who elicited this response from Condoleeza Rice:

RICE: I remember very well that the president was aware that there were issues inside the United States. He talked to people about this. But I don't remember the al Qaeda cells as being something that we were told we needed to do something about.

BEN-VENISTE: Isn't it a fact, Dr. Rice, that the August 6th PDB warned against possible attacks in this country? And I ask you whether you recall the title of that PDB?

RICE: I believe the title was, "Bin Laden Determined to Attack Inside the United States."

No, they really don't like him at all. Yesterday, he appeared on Hardball and said that in his opinion, the Bush administration should now be treated as Ronald Reagan always said (ad nauseum) he wanted to treat the Russians: Trust, but verify.

And he further went on to say (quote via Crooks and Liars):

On important, critical matters-ahh the President is now been shown not to be accurate and now hypocritical in terms of this leak investigation-the political fallout is huge in my view.

Soooooo close, Richard.

I'm telling you folks, the day people start going on television and just saying the plain and simple truth that anyone with a whole brain can see: The President is a liar-is the day we tear the roof off the place, and the walls come tumbling down.

Words are very important, and "now been shown not to be accurate" still leaves too much wriggle-room. The President of the United States is a liar. Repeat. Again. Again. Again.

My question is...

Ok, so there's a small to-do going on about the fact that Laura Bush has made it clear that gay families will be welcome to participate in the annual White House Easter Egg Roll. Yay. Egalia of the TGW feels this is proof that "the wrong gender is in charge of the country."

Yes, because Laura Bush is, automatically, much better than the man she married, because she has eggs. The fact that she's just standing by her man like a good little housewife should while a drunk drives his country off a cliff doesn't matter at all.

But hey, women goooooooood. Men baaaaaaaaad.

My broader question is, if you're a gay family, why the fuck would you want to go to George W. Bush's White House? (Other than to toss a few eggs in some well-directed places, perhaps)

I'm just trying to imagine what any self-respecting gay family could possibly be thinking...

"What's that, Mr. President? You say you want to make it unconstitutional for us to get married? You say you think we're a threat to marriage? You won't hesitate to "out" a gay reporter if he reports information that makes you look bad, you say? You say you actually pay anti-gay commentators? You say you refuse to formally recognize Gay Pride Month?

Oh, but if we wear ties and nice dresses we can still be used as political tools, you say? Oh, well, ok then! Dum de dum de dum de dumb..."

I say, let fools, whoops, excuse me I mean gay Republicans like Andrew Sullivan who've already twisted into pretzels trying to convince themselves Bush thinks they're human beings go. Let Matt Drudge and "Jeff Gannon" go, they're used to being used as Republican tools. And clearly intellectual honesty is not a problem for them, they don't have any.

Other than that, I can't think of one good reason why any gay family with a lick of pride would.

Still more words to live by

From Mastering Fiction Writing, by Kit Reed:

Being true to what you have to say, you will find your own level. If you're not true to it, you may not find any audience at all.

So long, Rev

The Rev. William Sloane Coffin, an inspiration for the Rev. Scott Sloan in Doonesbury, has died. Among other things, Rev. Coffin said this (via Daily Kos):

I think that hope reflects the state of our soul rather than the circumstances that surround our lives. So hope is not the equivalent of optimism. Its opposite is not pessimism but despair. So I'm always hopeful. Hope is about keeping the faith despite the evidence so that the evidence has a chance of changing.

Elsewhere, at Hullabaloo, tristero finds what he believes, and he makes a reasonably convincing case, is a lie repeatedly told about Dr. Coffin by none other than George W. Bush.

Reality and the right

And never the 'twain shall meet.

Give me a happy ending every time

Who Wants To Be A Super Hero, a new reality series hosted by Stan Lee.

Yes, really.

The eerily apt coincidence has just struck me

At the beginning of this season of "Veronica Mars," a bus full of Veronica's classmates took a dive off a cliff. It has now become unavoidable and undeniable that this is what the once "little series that could" has done as well.

Tonight's episode was a desperate attempt to make sense of several episodes worth of throwing everything they could at the wall in hopes that something would stick. You could almost hear the writers, stinking of desperation, crying, "See, see? It does all make sense, it does!"

Last season, it did. This season, not so much. And this episode had a couple of the weaknesses we've noted before as well-the insistence on introducing new characters we don't care about, and what is now clearly an obsession with cum jokes.

There are little flashes here and there of the show's former glory-putting Logan and Wallace together is inspired-but I gotta say I wouldn't be too disappointed if the forthcoming new CW network decided not to carry "Veronica" over after all.

I know most men undress women with their eyes

But in the case of Paris Hilton, I'll make an exception.

Yes, I should be paying more attention to Pink

Via Egalia, here are the lyrics to her new song, Dear Mr. President, and a link so you can listen to it.

Excerpts:

Dear Mr. President
Come take a walk with me
Let's pretend we're just two people and
You're not better than me
I'd like to ask you some questions if we can speak honestly

What kind of father would take his own daughter's rights away
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You've come a long way from whiskey and cocaine

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held high
Can you even look me in the eye

Now-I don't like 98% or so of all political songs, on a purely asthetic basis. For me, they sacrifice emotion for stridency.

This one works.

Pink is not my favorite singer, the odd single aside.

This one works.

The song is just human voices and a guitar, not Pink's usual dancefloor fare, which I probably would have preferred-I'm a Pet Shop Boys fan, you know.

This one works.

Backing vocals are by The Indigo Girls, a duo whose appeal I've never really understood (though they are the basis for one of my favorite jokes in My Girlfriend's Boyfriend, so I suppose I owe them something.)

This one works.

Anyway, go, read, hear.

Republicans: This is the world's smallest violin. And it's playing just for you.

Via AmericaBlog, another Republican crybaby comes out whining about how yeah, he voted for Bush (twice) and gave money to his campaign, but please don't confuse that with actually liking him.

In fact, gosh darn it, he doesn't consider himself a Republican any longer, so corrupt, incompetent and inept-he has suddenly realized-is the party today! Well, great timing. If you'd figured out that shit even two years ago, you could have saved this country untold billions of dollars and thousands of lives.

John at AmericaBlog sees the incredible disenchantment of the Republicans as a blessing fo the Democrats, a chance to woo the disgruntled over to "our" side. I'm sure that's quite the sensible, sane attitude to take and if I had traffic like AmericaBlogs, I might feel compelled to take it too.

But since, compartively speaking, no one is reading this, it gratifies me to be able to say: If you ever voted for Bush in your life (but especially if you voted for him twice): Fuck you. And if you know anyone who did, do something for all of us: Hit them.

I miss Tony

A kind of delayed reaction hit me watching tonight's 24...it finally sunk in that they really killed the character and he's never coming back. I think that may prove to have been a mistake. Probably not a show-killing, "shark-jumping" mistake, but a mistake nonetheless.

All I can say is, they'd better have a death in mind for Peter Weller's character that makes the torture he underwent as Murphy in Robocop look like a day at the fucking beach. He killed David Palmer. He killed Michelle. He killed Tony.

I want him deader than dead. I want him to suffer.

I'm also not sure I'm loving the relaunch they're doing of President Logan...it'll be interesting to re-view the season next year on DVD, to see if it fits together as well as previous seasons have. At the moment, I'm thinking not.

Billy Crystal did a funny routine about the series on The Tonight Show the other night, talking about the fact that basically, Chloe is god. He's right, of course.

I miss Tony.

Go, West young men (and women)

New York Times article on the final days of The West Wing. Interesting trivia: The writers had apparently intended to have the Democrat played by Jimmy Smits lose the election they've been running all year.

In the end, he won. The reason: They felt it would be too depressing following the death of the great John Spencer, whose character was Smits' running mate.

Some nice quotes from the actors who have been with the series right out of the gate:

Bradley Whitford, who portrays Josh Lyman, most recently
manager of the Santos campaign...

"This show is probably the first line in my obituary," Mr. Whitford said. "Everyone knows they got lucky with this one."

As the saying goes: The harder they worked, the luckier they got.

Mr. Sheen was offered an opportunity to see how his character's appeal would play in a real-life campaign. Not long ago,he said, he was approached by Democratic Party representatives from his native state, Ohio, to see if he would be interested in running for the United States Senate after he left the show. Though he would have had little trouble drafting a campaign platform — he is a fierce opponent of nuclear power and the war in Iraq, and a champion of human rights — he turned them down.

"I'm just not qualified," he said. "You're mistaking celebrity for credibility."

Martin Sheen: The flip side of Alec Baldwin and Richard "I'm speaking for the whole world" Gere, and one of the only exceptions to my general rule that actors shouldn't talk.

"In order to sometimes get a different perspective on what's going down in the world, to reach back to your humanity, you read novels," Mr. Sheen said. "We're like the reading of a novel."

And what will Mr. Sheen be doing now that the series is over?

At 65, he has decided to make good on a promise he made to himself long ago: to enroll, for the first time, in college. A graduate, though just barely, of Chaminade High School in Dayton, Ohio, nearly five decades ago, he will began taking classes next fall — in English literature, philosophy and, he hopes, oceanography — at National University of Ireland in Galway, in the country where his mother was born.

How can you not like such a man? I mean really, how cool is that?

From "One Sunday Morning," by Amy Ephron

Mary wondered, at the time, if Betsy hadn't commented on it or hadn't commented on it in quite the way she did, if it wouldn't have just passed, subsided, receded, if you will, into a faint glancing moment, one of the things you see and then forget about, rather than something as piercing as a shard of glass that becomes forever imbedded in one's memory, so that every time any one of them would see Lizzie Carswell after that, they would remember that morning when they saw her coming out of the Gramercy Park Hotel.

This is a sentence that got away from somebody.

Okay, the Seymour Hersh thing (updated)

You may have heard about a Seymour Hersh article that says Bush is planning to attack Iran, with the possibility of nuclear bombs very much on the table. And what's spookiest of all is, as Paul Krugman says:

Most strategic analysts think that a bombing campaign would be a disastrous mistake. But that doesn't mean it won't happen: Mr. Bush ignored similar warnings, including those of his own father, about the risks involved in invading Iraq.

Current polls suggest that the Democrats could take one or both houses of Congress this November, acquiring the ability to launch investigations backed by subpoena power. This could blow the lid off multiple Bush administration scandals. Political analysts openly suggest that an attack on Iran offers Mr. Bush a way to head off this danger, that an appropriately timed military strike could change the domestic political dynamics.

Or as JMM wrote in Talking Points Memo, is there anyone who thinks this presidency is not capable of this?

Meanwhile, on the talking heads shows, Hersh is saying why he feels Bush is doing do this.

HERSH: The word I hear is messianic. He thinks, as I wrote, that he's the only one now who will have the courage to do it. He's politically free. I don't think he's overwhelmingly concerned about the '06 elections, congressional elections. I think he really thinks he has a chance, and this is going to be his mission.

This goes just so far beyond this man must be stopped. This man must be stopped.

With a "hat tip" to TalkLeft.

I've been wanting to be asked these questions for about 10 years

And since I'm unlikely to be a guest on Inside The Actor's Studio any time in the near future, I scooped up this Meme, unbidden, from a fella named Tom Hilton. I may as well get my answers down somehow.

What is your favorite word? Brouhaha.

What is your least favorite word? Squat.

What turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Good music...broadly defined, so we're not just talking about the kind you can hear on record or play on instruments (although we are talking about that). The music of birds, the music of talk, the hum of the universe.

What turns you off? Bad music. Ditto.

What is your favorite curse word? It's not really a curse word, and one or two of you will probably know where I got it: "Motherpusbucket!"

What sound or noise do you love? Gently running water. Like from a stream, trickling away low in the background. Or, waves on the beach.

What sound or noise do you hate? Loud engines like motorcycles.

What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? I would love to be able to be a pianist.

What profession would you not like to do? Hot Dog On A Stick girl.

If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

"She's waiting for you."

Which yes, I know, begs the question:

Who is she? That changes.

I'm tossing this up to whoever wants it.

Ugly scars divide the nation (updated)

Update-Truthout contributor Jason Leopold:

In early June 2003, Vice President Dick Cheney met with President Bush and told him that CIA officer Valerie Plame Wilson was the wife of Iraq war critic Joseph Wilson and that she was responsible for sending him on a fact-finding mission to Niger to check out reports about Iraq's attempt to purchase uranium from the African country, according to current and former White House officials and attorneys close to the investigation to determine who revealed Plame-Wilson's undercover status to the media.

The revelation puts a new wrinkle into Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald's two-year-old criminal probe into the leak and suggests for the first time that President Bush knew from early on that the vice president and senior officials on his staff were involved in a coordinated effort to attack Wilson's credibility by leaking his wife's classified CIA status.

Emphasis mine.

Journalist Greg Palast on just what crime our president has committed-and what should happen to him as a result, if we were in fact a nation of laws and not of men.

On February 10, 2004, our not-so-dumb-as-he-sounds President stated, "Listen, I know of nobody -- I don't know of anybody in my administration who leaked classified information. If somebody did leak classified information, I'd like to know it, and we'll take the appropriate action. And this investigation is a good thing. ...And if people have got solid information, please come forward with it."

Notice Bush's cleverly crafted words. He says he can't name anyone who leaked this "classified" info -- knowing full well he'd de-classified it. Far from letting Bush off the hook, it worsens the crime. For years, I worked as a government investigator and, let me tell you, Bush and Cheney withholding material information from the grand jury is a felony. Several felonies, actually: abuse of legal process, fraud, racketeering and, that old standby, obstruction of justice.

If you or I had manipulated the legal system this way, we'd be breaking rocks on a chain gang. We wouldn't even get a trial -- most judges would consider this a "fraud upon the court" and send us to the slammer in minutes using the bench's power to administer instant punishment for contempt of the judicial system.

(Aside from Ben-this is another one of those times when I'm really, really looking forward to seeing Bush's next polling numbers. Now, back to Greg)

Statements aimed at misleading grand jury investigators are hard-time offenses. It doesn't matter that Bush's too-clever little quip was made to the press and not under oath. I've cited press releases and comments in the New York Times in court as evidence of fraud. By not swearing to his disingenuous statement, Bush gets off the perjury hook, but he committed a crime nonetheless, "deliberate concealment."

Here's how the law works (and hopefully, it will). The Bush gang's use of the telephone in this con game constituted wire fraud. Furthermore, while presidents may leak ("declassify") intelligence information, they may not obstruct justice; that is, send a grand jury on a wild goose chase.

Thanks to litbrit (via Shakespeare's Sister) for the link.

So you want to see 250,000 multi-coloured 'superballs' bouncing down the streets of San Francisco

We here at Dictionopolis in Digitopolis have anticipated your every need.

I'm not following this

Those of you who read the old blog may remember last May, when the networks wouldn't run an ad by the United Church of Christ which said "like Jesus -- the United Church of Christ seeks to welcome all people, regardless of ability, age, race, economic circumstance or sexual orientation." Although ABC, at least, was happy to provide airtime to Focus On The Family, the pro-Bush, "pro-life," anti-gay group.

Now, the UCC has come up with another ad that they feel promotes their message of acceptance. And although the broadcast networks, with their typical courage, are refusing to run this one too, it is running on cable channels including A&E, AMC, BET, CNN, CNN, Headline, Hallmark, History, TBS, TNT, E!, and Lifetime. But not, however, on LOGO, which is (nominally) the gay and lesbian network.

I'll say that again: The gay and lesbian network...is refusing to run an ad...that promotes acceptance and tolerance of minorities, explicitly including homosexuals.

You'd be well within your rights to ask: Why?

A Viacom-owned network, LOGO is operated by MTV, which states that its standards and practices could not accept the UCC's 30- second commercial "because of the political nature of its content," according to a sales associate's e-mail response on March 30.


When asked for an official reason, MTV Networks responded, "Our guidelines state we will not accept religious advertisements that may be deemed as disparaging to another religion."

Ron Buford, director of the UCC's Stillspeaking Initiative, says the 1.3-million-member denomination's four-year identity campaign was created after focus group testing revealed the depth to which people felt alienated or rejected by organized religion. The church's new "ejector" ad uses humor to convey the message, "God doesn't reject people. Neither do we."

"I guess the idea of gay TV doesn't really mean it's your community's network," Buford told United Church News. "It's just something that's targeted at you to sell product."

On a completely unrelated matter, "The L Word" jewelry and perfume lines are now avalible.

This blog doesn't get a lot of traffic from Alabama

In fact, of our last 100 drop-ins (y'all come back now, y'hear?), exactly none have come from Sweet Home Alabama.

As you can well imagine, this has long been a source of shame to me.

But now, at least, I think I finally understand it. You see, I think it's because I have, on occasion, been known to run pictures that suggest some women-in fact most, if the truth be told-have breasts.

Apparently, this sort of thing just isn't done in Alabama. A state where, BTW, it is unlawful to sell dildos while wearing bowling shoes.

We know this sort of thing just isn't done in Alabama (via Pam's House Blend) because of a woman named Loretta Nall, who is currently running for governor of that state on the Libertarian Party ticket.

An Alabama newspaper recently chose to run a photo of the candidate (not supplied to them by her) that reveals a bit of cleavage. It's not cleavage likely to appall any of us who were born in the big cities, but the columnist with whose work the photo ran was shocked-shocked!

In 55 years of political writing, that was a first for me—-a picture in my column of a woman displaying cleavage. I can only hope that my mother...and I know for a fact where she ended in the after life...didn’t see that column. She wouldn’t have approved of that picture.

Now, we here at Dictionopolis in Digitopolis have certain mixed emotions about Libertarian women with large boobs at the moment, for entirely personal reasons. But can we agree that these $&#&*^% loons are ridiculous?

Nice

Every once in a while, This Modern World hits one out of the park.

Maybe I should be paying more attention to Pink

I mean at this point, all I really know about her is that I quite like one or two of her singles, and I've seen one or two images of her I'm not unenthusiastic about either. But in recent interviews she's coming off pretty sensible.

...Pink did plenty of promo this past week, playing a secret show in New York and taping episodes of "Dateline" and "The Oprah Winfrey Show," where she got the dialogue started on the story behind her hit single "Stupid Girls."

While the celebrity angle of Pink's neofeminist critique got "Dateline" interested, Oprah Winfrey was more concerned about the lack of strong female role models. Calling her episode "Stupid Girls," Winfrey also invited onto the program four teenage girls and Karrine Steffans, author of "Confessions of a Video Vixen," to bring the discussion back to how girls are taught to act "stupid" and how to change that.

"I personally need more examples of how to be better and how to be stronger and how to go a different way," Pink said on the show. "I need more examples, so I can't even imagine being in school and looking around. And now it's cool to have a sex tape. Are you kidding me?"

Pink said she's trying not to think about all the attention the song is getting, but at the same time, this is exactly what she wanted — to start a discussion about who we choose to celebrate and why. In a world where women are still reduced to what they look like versus what they have to say, Pink wanted to make her fellow females realize how much of that has to change from within.

At the same time, Pink said the attention isn't about driving her record sales higher. In fact, she told Lauer she wishes her biggest album, Missundaztood, hadn't sold as many copies. "What?" Lauer responded. "You now have become the first recording artist I've ever sat across from who said, 'I wanted that album to sell fewer copies.' Why?"

"It sold 16 million records," Pink said. "And I didn't want that. Where do you go from there? Anything you do after that's a failure."

Prudent thinking, Pink-thats one of the things that drove Michael Jackson so batshit insane: Watching his sales fall after Thriller.

A horse made all out of wood; a dragon made out of a straw

Via the MAKE Blog; the artist is Heather Jansch.



Via Neatorama; I couldn't find a credit for the artist.

As well they might

Via TGW.

Must be an even-numbered year

Because recent experience has shown, only in even-numbered years do I ever think an episode (usually only one that year) of SNL is funny almost all the way through. Last night's/this morning's was it for 2006, thanks for the most part to host Antonio Banderas.

With all the Philadelphias and the Zorros and the Pancho Villas and the Femme Fatales and the Original Sins, you can forget how funny that guy can be. How can you not like a guy secure enough to go out on live television, declare, "The truth is...I'm a woman!" pull off a breakway suit and stand there in a red mini-dress, complete with falsies?

I don't know about you, but I can't not like such a guy.

The Mexican soap parody was also great. I'm pretty sure at least one or two of the sketches were written by the women performers just to give themselves an excuse to give Banderas a lap dance, but who's gonna blame 'em? I'd probably do the same myself if Beyonce were hosting or something.

...but the cameo by Chris Kattan hurt like an earache. And, SNL being SNL, two or three of the sketches had no endings. The obligitory Zorro sketch made me miss Chris Farley (no mean feat, I assure you).

Cut to Ben banging his head against the computer desk

Saturday...The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation presented...the 17th annual GLAAD Media Awards...winners included [Charlize Theron, for the "Vanguard Award'], Felicity Huffman's transsexual road trip "Transamerica" for outstanding film in limited release; cable TV's chic lesbian ensemble "The L Word" for outstanding drama series, and NBC's "Will & Grace" for outstanding comedy series.

Sometimes I wonder why I even bother trying to write a love story about two people who happen to be lesbian, but more importantly, are loving, well-spoken people. I mean apparently, you can write about loveless people, give them laughably bad dialogue, and as long as you make them gay you'll win awards and get renewed.

In case you were wondering why I haven't said anything about the "Immigration Reform" thing

It's two reasons. One, I don't feel that I know enough about the issue, and although I'm sure I have, I try not to give uninformed opinions. Two, it's exactly what the GOP wants us to be talking about. It's this season's gay marriage.

Rep. J. D. Hayworth, R-AZ, declared on Meet the Press that "Immigration Reform" is the most significant issue facing America today...

In a sound bite laden appearance, Rep. Hayworth, representing a border state, and a Republican up for re-election, apparently feels that the wasteful and distasteful War in Iraq, our fostering civil war in Iraq, and the President's treason by security leak, can all be swept under the rug until after the election.

Another Example Of What John Kerry Has Done To Me

He's made me agree with Tracey Schmitt, RNC spokesman. See, Kerry has made what the NY Times (via Daily Kos' Georgia10) describes as "A Slashing Attack On The Bush Administration."

Find Osama bin Laden and secure our ports and our homeland. Bring our troops home from Iraq. Obey the law and protect our civil rights," Mr. Kerry said in ticking off his list, which also included supporting health care, education, lobbying reform and alternatives to oil, as well as reducing the deficit.

Georgia10 feels Kerry is

Plain-spoken. Blunt. Scathing in his rhetoric (yeah, I'm describing John Kerry, can you believe it?). A true Fighting Dem.

While as I say, I find myself in agreement with

Tracey Schmitt, the RNC spokesman, [who] responded in her typical catty manner and dismissed Kerry's statements ("John Kerry deserves credit for continuing to take himself so seriously, despite the fact that no one else does"),

I feel the need to say to anybody actually getting wet or hard about this "new" John Kerry something similar to that which I'd say to people star-struck by the "new" Al Gore: I am not impressed by what Democrats do when the heat's off.

John Kerry finally came to fight, eh? Woo! With the President's popularity tied to an anchor, that certainly takes bold political courage.

Blog headlines that should have been rephrased

Republican Dad gets son off in AZ sex case

Via Crooks and Liars:

"A 19 and 17 year old from Arizona, have been offered a plea deal which requires no jail time and virtually no penalty for crimes they admitted to commiting. What were these crimes? As counselors at a boys camp, the 19 and 17 year old punished 18 of the 11-14 year old boys by making them lay face down on their bed, in front of all the other boys, shoving a broomstick into their anus through their pants...One may ask how this could happen. It is really quite simple. The 19 year old, Ryan Bennett, is none other than the son of Arizona's Senate President, Ken Bennett, a Republican who is part of the effort to ban equal rights for same-sex couples in the state, viewing same-sex relationships as immoral...After his son's admission, Bennett wrote a letter to the D.A. handling the case informing her that his son could not rightfully serve time in jail, because he is prepared to leave the country on a mission - to teach the word of Christ to youth around the world..."

What's playing at the Bijou?

Bijou Phillips, that is, actress in mostly-bad films that she dresses up by revealing her undressed body, model, daughter of John Phillips (the resident composer and guitarist in The Mamas & The Papas), and once-and-future aspiring pop singer.

According to some people I could mention, this blog is exactly the same as The Daily Kos

Echidne swipes back at Ellen Goodman, a columnist at whom I've looked askance ever since I heard her insane appearance on the Alex Bennett morning radio show in San Francisco. On that occasion many years ago, she made clear her ignorance of technology (and dig it, if I say you're ignorant of technology, you're really ignorant of technology.)

Sadly, it would seem that in the years betwixt and between, she has still not learned that it is considered best to actually have some goddamn information on a topic before you begin judging it.

She apparently can't tell the difference between bloggers like Kos and Debbie Schlussel, or indeed, from a hole in the ground and her...

Lo, the irony

"Casablanca" has been named the greatest movie script of all time by the Writers Guild of America. What's ironic is that if you know about the making of the movie, you know that the writers were literally making it up as they went along, during filming.

If memory serves they didn't even have the ending until the night before it was to be shot-and possibly not even until that morning(!)

It was the kind of filmmaking, in other words, that many writers (including myself) decry. We look at all the sequels and formula romatic comedies that are moved into production without finished or adequate scripts to be "fixed on the fly." And we say, "Why can't they take the time to get the script right first? The movies would be so much better then."

And then, "Casablanca," a movie that moved into production without a finished or adequate script, is named the best screenplay of all time. By writers, yet. It's times like this I wish I drank more.

"Tootsie," number 17 on the list, is an example of the writer gang-bang class of screenwriting, according to one of the credited writers, my hero Larry Gelbart. Same for "Jaws" (#63)

For the record here's the full list. My favorite film in the top 10 is "Some Like It Hot," by Wilder and Diamond. And I still think "Pulp Fiction" is way, way overrated. Kinda glad to see Ramis & Rubin's "Groundhog Day" get in there-that's a movie that really holds up. My man James L. Brooks gets in with "Broadcast News."

Then again, any list of supposedly great screenplays that includes "Star Wars" is not a list I can take wholly lying down.

My Chicks

Oh, and the Dalai Lama is anti-gay

From the Telegraph:

Although he is known for his tolerant, humane views, he is a surprisingly harsh critic of homosexuality. If you are a Buddhist, he says, it is wrong. "Full stop.

No way round it.

"A gay couple came to see me, seeking my support and blessing. I had to explain our teachings. Another lady introduced another woman as her wife - astonishing. It is the same with a husband and wife using certain sexual practices. Using the other two holes is wrong."

At this point, he looks across at his interpreter - who seems mainly redundant - to check that he has been using the right English words to discuss this delicate matter. The interpreter gives a barely perceptible nod.

"A Western friend asked me what harm could there be between consenting adults having oral sex, if they enjoyed it," the Dalai Lama continues, warming to his theme. "But the purpose of sex is reproduction, according to Buddhism. The other holes don't create life. I don't mind - but I can't condone this way of life."

I'd just like to take this moment to formally thank Tom Delay

Seriously. Any of us who spend any time in a day making fun of Republicans, from pissants like myself to pros like Jon Stewart & his colleagues or Garry Trudeau, owe Tom Delay a sincere debt of gratitude.

What with the indictment, the coming perp walk, and the hypocritical crocodile tears of partisanship, his troubles have been a positive boon.

But, I know what you're saying.

You're saying, if only there was some evidence that he'd actually gone so far as to whore out his own daughter as a tub toy for lobbyists.

Well, guess what.

There is such evidence.

My mother taught me the proper thing to do in situations like this...

So, Mr. Delay, should you be looking in, thank you so much for the inspirations for my little blog. I hope it will be a comfort to you in prison that you did, at least, do some good.

Sincerely,

Ben

Another reason to feel good about John McCain

Here he is aligning himself with Janet LaRue, chief counsel for Concerned Women for America, and Tony Perkins, president of the Family Research Council.

These are both conservative, "faith-based" groups. You may remember the CWFA, they're the ones who promote name-calling in school, warned parents against allowing their children to watch Buffy and think Barbie leads to lesbianism. They were among those who called for a boycott of a doll company because it was partnered with a non-profit corporation that promotes high self-esteem among girls, even if they be lesbian or bisexual. And they're the ones who even found something to object to on the coffee cups at Starbucks.

As for the group led by Tony "I'm named after a closeted gay actor who was best known for playing a psychopath" Perkins, among other friendly things, the Family Research council has a connection to the Ku Klux Klan.

Exactly the sort of people it makes one feel good to see John McCain sucking up to.

Source: AmericaBlog

This looks like a really uncomfortable position in which to stand

It's Emmy Rossum, by the way, a singer/actress about whom I know little save that at times she is quite beautiful.



Source

There was nothing for the Scarlet Pumpernickel to do...but blow his brains out. Which, he did.

Via TPM:

From this morning's Hill e-newsletter: "DeLay said Thursday that announcing his resignation has been liberating. Quoting Martin Luther King. Jr., DeLay said, 'Free at last, free at last. Thank God Almighty, I'm free at last.'"

Chick Lit Defined (maybe)

Echidine has found an article or two from the Guardian in the UK that purport to shore up both sides in the war between the sexes. They come from two surveys on novels that men say have "changed their lives" vs. the ones women do.

The novel that means most to men is about indifference, alienation and lack of emotional responses. That which means most to women is about deeply held feelings, a struggle to overcome circumstances and passion, research by the University of London has found.

Maybe I am writing chick lit after all...

"On the whole, men between the ages of 20 and 50 do not read fiction. This should have some impact on the book trade. There was a moment when car manufacturers realised that it was women who bought the family car, and the whole industry changed. We need fiction publishers - many of whom are women - to go through the same kind of recognition," Prof Jardine said.

It's true, actually, I don't read much and I'm right in the middle of that age group. I read all the time, but it's mostly nonfiction, apart from a few mystery series to which I'm addicted. Echidone finds fault with the studies, and not without reason:

So let me summarize: Two studies are done with different sized groups of respondents, neither selected properly. The two studies have different questions for the subject to answer, and result in two different lists of books. Conclusion: men and women are different breeds of people! Perhaps. But it's much more likely that these are not well-done studies and that we can't draw many conclusions from them.

As an aside, I have read all the books on the men's list and also all the books on the women's list. None of those changed my life much. What did change my life was Agatha Christie's The Murder on the Orient Express. I was around eight years old when I read it and it blew my brain. To think that they were all guilty!

She's probably right. For the record, I've read more of the men's list than the women's, the men's list is also longer than the women's (we're obsessed by length).

Mystery date

Go to Wikipedia and look up your birth day (excluding the year).
List three neat facts, two births and one death in your blog or journal, including the year.

( September 1 )

Neat facts:

1972 - In Reykjavík, Iceland, American Bobby Fischer beats Russian Boris Spassky and becomes the world chess champion.

Almost 15 years later, Benny Andersson, Tim Rice and Bjorn Ulvaeus' Chess becomes one of my favorite show scores. Coincidence?

Russia - Knowledge Day

But you knew that.

In the Harry Potter books September 1, the day on which the Hogwarts Express departs from Platform 9¾, always falls on a Sunday; this means that the first day of lessons is always a Monday.

"Everyday is like Sunday, Everyday is silent and grey."
morrissey

Births:

1939 - Lily Tomlin, American actress, comedienne
1946 - Barry Gibb,English singer (Bee Gees)

Death:

1969 - Drew Pearson, American newspaper columnist (b. 1897)

You're not helping your case

I am currently reading a book called/about Paul Verhoeven, the director of the original, hit Basic Instinct (specifically, this book). It's pretty good, but it's in the mode of being a book for fans, by a fan-criticism goes by the wayside in favor of slavish devotion.

Interesting quote from the director, who reportedly has long wanted to do a serious film about the life of Jesus:

'The most historically correct image of Jesus and his time is to be found in The Life of Brian, the comedy by the Monty Python team.'

But here's where the book's author, Rob van Scheers, doesn't help his case. In the chapter on Basic Instinct, he's trying to draw a parallel with North By Northwest. He does this by reprinting a page or so of the dialogue from each.

Let me make myself clear: He gives us a chance to make a direct comparision between Ernest Lehman's dialogue and that of Joe Eszterhas. This is not a good move. Lehman's dialogue is sheer pleasure and Eszterhas' puts one in need of a shower.

Not that Lehman is credited, of course, which brings me to my next point. In the same chapter, Verhoeven boasts of how he childishly tried to make the date-rape scene in the movie as offensive as he could. As a kind of "I'll show you!" to the demonstrators the film had attracted.

He then praises Michael Douglas' "bravery" in playing it so explicitly. Not a word, however (in the whole book) about Jeanne Tripplehorn, who only had to play the victim of the date-rape; therefore showed no courage, and deserves no admiration.

My, my. All this good, interesting material-and I haven't even gotten to the chapter on Showgirls yet...

Tim Rice knew it all along

Gospel of Judas revealed at last
1,700 year old Gnostic text says Judas' 'betrayal' was at Christ's request.

Oh yes, about the Scooter Libby leak case...

Looks like Mr. Libby's attorney's had a similar sit-down discussion with him to the one Mr. Delay's had. In this one, they said "Hey, you have two choices. You can remain loyal to an administration that everybody in the world hates and go to prison for most of the rest of your life. Or you can sing."

And Mr. Libby said, "Gimme a C chord! La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la!"

Turns out, the people who authorized the leaks were (prepare yourself for a shock)...Dick Cheney. And George W. Bush.

Who could have seen it coming, who? I mean, what were the fucking odds?

Thank you, thank you, thank you and thank...YOU!

You Are Fozzie Bear

"Wocka! Wocka!" You're the life of the party, and you love making people crack up. If only your routine didn't always bomb! You may find more groans than laughs, but always keep the jokes coming.

The Muppet Personality Test

Yet more words to live by

From Douglas Adams, as quoted in Don't Panic by Neil Gaiman.

"I often wonder how I'd react to [Hitchhiker's] if I wasn't me, but I was still me, so to speak, and how much I'd like it, and how much I'd be a fan or whatever. The way I would perceive it in among everything else. Obviously I can't answer that question, I have no idea, because I'm the one person who can't look at it from outside."

From J.D. Salinger, as quoted by Gary Ross, in Why We Write: Personal Statements And Photographic Portraits Of 25 Top Screenwriters, edited and photographed by Lorian Tamara Elbert.

In Seymour: An Introduction, J.D. Salinger gives great advice about writing. He says that writing is easy. You just pick the book you want to read more than any in the world, and you write it for yourself.

Oh, God...

This is simply not a good week for television shows I like, except for "Gilmore Girls" and "24". First I find out, as noted below, that Showtime's admirable promotional push for Huff, its word of mouth, critical acclaim and the Emmys it won translated to no new viewers-in fact a lot less.

Then tonight's "Veronica Mars", after two or three episodes that seemed to be pulling out of the steep dive into irrelvance the series had fallen into in previous weeks, fell right back into it.

Then I come across this little gem of information:

After getting a lesson in improvisation at the legendary comedy workshop The Groundlings, the models are challenged to successfully deliver a mostly-improvised CoverGirl commercial, and one lucky girl, whose improv skills are superior, wins a guest starring role on "Veronica Mars," on AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL

Ah, but there's good news tonight. On that same web page, you'll find a banner ad for "The First Annual Reality TV Convention." And in what state is this waste of time being held?

Come on people, say it with me...

Sigh...

USA Today via Yahoo! News...

Despite a free-preview weekend, the second-season premiere of Showtime's Huff averaged a low 372,000 viewers Sunday, down from 456,000 for the 2004 series opener.

I suppose I shouldn't be surprised; the fact that I like 24 and it's actually a top 20 show is the surprise.

Trippy

Space...the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship...Christopher Walken...

Source: Mighty Optical Illusions

Oh! And...

Via the talking dog:

Deputy press secretary for...Homeland Security Brian Doyle was indicted in Polk County, Florida and awaits extradition on charges that he attempted to seduce what he believed to be a 14-year old girl over the internet.

...as far as I recall, the one thing you could say about the crop of Bushies and their Republican allies, in contrast to Clinton, was that it was never about sex. (Don't ask me why that ever made a difference; the irritating combination of prurience and prudishness endemic in this country is a wonder to the rest of the world... and not in a good way.)

Well, guess what? This one is about sex. And the grossest kind of sex: icky sexual advances toward what Mr. Doyle believed to be a 14-year old girl (he is 55). I guess the Bush Administration will write him off as an isolated incident and a very minor player in the great scheme of things.

Hating Kevin Federline: Now, it's personal

In the past, I only vaguely disliked Kevin Federline, in the way Shakespeare's Sister so aptly describes as I-hate-you-because-I-know-who-you-are. That means it's because without my ever seeking a lick of information about him, some knowledge of his general persona has penetrated my conciousness. And that general persona seems to be something of a bum. I looked forward to the forthcoming release of his debut "album" with the same anticipation with which I look forward to four more years of Republican misrule. I also don't like people who, from all appearances, have no business calling themselves fathers.

But as I say, that's all vague and based on heresay. Now...now he's ripping off Thomas Dolby. I'm sorry, we don't allow that here on Dictionopolis In Digitopolis, wherin we consider Mr. Dolby a Jesus of keyboard music, one of the great living songwriters and producers.

Mr. Dolby posted on his blog a few days ago...

"Kevin Federline, whom I’d never heard of until a few days ago, appears to have illegally sampled one of my compositions...And laws aside, he owed it to me as an artist to ask if I minded that he recorded a vitriolic rap over the top of my music.”

“So K-Fed, if you’re reading this, I’m asking you nicely to take the track down ASAP. Or maybe you’d prefer me to come after some of your wife’s ill-gotten gains?”

Go Pulp Culture on his ass, Tom. Blind him with science.

Thanks to Paste Magazine for telling me about this.

And speaking of things that are real fuckin' simple

In Talking Points Memo, Joshua Micah Marshall writes...

DeLay's lawyers must have sat him down over the last 72 hours and explained to him that he needs to focus on not spending most of the rest of his life in prison.

I've said it before and I'll say it again

There is no such thing as a dignified photo of George W. Bush. Shakespeare's Sister has a box full of examples, of which these are my favorites.

Okay, the "Delay goes bye-bye" thing (updated)

So. Tom Delay, the indicted republican...what am I saying...one of the indicted republicans who has cried partisanship as his flaunting of the rules has become more and more apparent, has announced that he will quit the congress, and not seek re-election.

He says he's doing this because of the polls. Firedoglake says that's a bit out of character, and suggests his former chief of staff pleading guilty to conspiracy might have had something to do with it.

Jane also notes the reaction from the GOP faithful.

there is always comedy from the Free Republic:

Seriously. He’s been much more open about speaking of his relationship with God, and he might have decided he’s going to spend the rest of his life working for foster care, and for his Christian values.

It is extraordinarily hard for a mark to accept he’s just been sold a case of snake oil.

AmericaBlog agrees Delay's doing this becuase he's in even bigger trouble than any of us thought.

If Delay told Chris Matthews he pulled out of the race because the polls were bad, well then clearly that isn't the reason.

Bad news for the Republicans. Rather than take Delay out of the picture, Delay is now an even bigger story. The ongoing investigation is going to make news until the election. And this puts to rest any of the Republicans' snarking about how the prosecutor was a Democrat. He clearly caught delay doing something wrong.

But back to the Republicans, way for Delay to ruin the one year anniversary of the Terri Schiavo fiasco for the religious right. Though it's ironic that last week was Schiavo week since that's when the Republicans really started melting down. And Delay's downfall shows it ain't gonna get any better any time soon.

You know who I believe, but judge for yourself...lord knows, Tom Delay is a classy guy.

Flashforward

Whether by intelligent design or just happenstance, the second episode of Huff's second season is already available On Demand here. I'm happy to report it is much better than the overstuffed season premiere.

It's real fuckin' simple

Paul Krugman:

...it's important to hold someone like Mr. McCain — who is still widely regarded as a moderate, in spite of his extremely conservative voting record — accountable when he cozies up to Mr. Falwell. Nobody thinks that Mr. McCain shares all of Mr. Falwell's views. But when Mr. McCain said that the Christian right has a right to be part of the Republican Party, he was in effect saying that Mr. Falwell's statements are within the realm of acceptable political discourse.

...if you choose to make common cause with religious extremists, you are accepting some responsibility for their extremism. By welcoming Mr. Falwell and people like him as members of their party, Republicans are saying that it's O.K. — not necessarily correct, but O.K. — to declare that 9/11 was America's punishment for its tolerance of abortion and homosexuality, that Islam is a terrorist religion, and that Jews can't go to heaven. And voters should judge the Republican Party accordingly.

Thanks, TGW.

Some liberals you should listen to

The Koufax awards have gone out. As usual, they're a good way to separate the big boys and girls from the kiddies in the blogsphere. The bright and shining stars of the firmament therof include:

Josh Marshall
Kos
Digby
The Smiths-loving Shakespeare's Sister
The much-cited-here firedoglake
And Tennessee Guerilla Women, who are currently the second-best reason not to simply peel up that state and flick it away like an old scab (the best reason being, of course, the music).

You can find good readin' and reportin' at them all.

Cartoon

That's the saddest flying elephant I've ever seen

Amid at Cartoon Brew found a website devoted to Polish movie posters.

For those of you who like McCain

I was wondering how you feel about him cozying up to his new butt-buddy, Jerry Falwell, who, he says, is "no longer an agent of intolerance?"

Really.

Wow, tell us Mr. McCain, exactly when was it that Falwell stopped being an agent of intolerance? Was it when, just days after the September 11 attacks, Falwell blamed gays and lesbians, and pro-choice Americans, and the ACLU for the September 11 attacks? Yeah, that was a great moment in tolerance.

Or was it a year later in October 2002 when Jerry Falwell said that Mohammed was a terrorist?

"I think Muhammad was a terrorist. I read enough of the history of his life written by both Muslims and - non-Muslims, (to know) that he was a – a violent man, a man of war."

Or was it in March of 2006 when Falwell told Jews they're going to hell?

And this is John McCain's new Very Best Friend. So, for those of you who like McCain...I was just wondering: How you like him now?

That sound you hear is every single straight man in America saying "No thanks, I'll wait for Cinemax."

Ice Age: The Meltdown may be set millions of years ago, but it was Basic Instinct 2 that looked like a relic from another era. The long-gestating sequel to the 1992 thriller that made Sharon Stone's career seduced only an estimated $3.2 million from 1,453 sites. In terms of number of tickets sold, that's about an eighth of the opening of the first Basic Instinct, a smash in its day that evidently did not resonate through the years. The success of The Silence of the Lambs sequel, Hannibal, after a 10-year wait was an exception—unless they're iconic, thawing out franchises after more than four years generally leads to sizable drops in grosses.

I'm going to say "ouch" for Ms. Stone. When your film is sold almost solely on the promise of seeing you in the buff, and a nation decides "Eh. We've seen it."

...Well, I'm guessing that must be one cold splash of water.

I'm guessing Paul Verhoeven and Joe Eszterhas have had a happy conversation about this, too.

So how do I feel about the two-hour second season premiere of "Huff?"

Short version: Disappointing, but I'm still in.

Long version: The second-season premiere of "The West Wing" was the two-part In The Shadow Of Two Gunmen, which is commonly held to be that show's finest hours.

"Huff" did not meet that standard, and may satisfy people like me who have 13 episodes of experience with these characters under our belts more than the hoped-for new, larger audience.

Why? Well, first of all, let's get the bad stuff out of the way. I was surprised that they didn't change the percussive dialogue samples in the opening credits. I love them (I love the whole flippin' credits sequence) but they're all from the first season and I had assumed they'd mark the transition by changing them.

I feel that "Huff" really shouldn't be two hours. Taking more time and space than most shows would is a big part of the series' dramatic strength, but one-hour episodes seem to be just the right doses. With a two-hour running time, there was room for one too many speeches I would have trimmed, were I in the cutting room.

There's a period of adjustment to be reckoned with, when you come to a new season of a series-like dropping back into their world. "Gilmore Girls" handles this really well, actually-when time has gone by between episodes, they often make it that time has gone by for the characters, too.

It's kind of unfortunate that so much real time has gone by between seasons of "Huff"-this is supposed to be a week after the end of last season but Huff's son has, shall we say, gone through a growth spurt.

I don't know how "The Sopranos" does it-I don't watch, but don't they take something like four years between seasons? I used to think that was better than the treadmill of network TV, but there's a definite drawback if you're dealing with adolescents.

Plus there was a line referencing the hurricane. Trouble is, if the first season is set when it first aired (2004)and this is only a week later...topical references to the outside world should be avoided, is what I'm saying.

The episode also suffered from having to clear up the debris left at the end of last season. At one point Huff's assistant and friend Paula, trying to comfort his wife, Beth, tells her that all the angst the family has suffered is: "Just god trying to move a whole lot of shit out of the way at once." I can't help feeling that was the writer wailing as he cleared the decks.

And yet...my sympathies are still so wholly with the title character I almost found myself praying along with Paula tonight as she asked Jesus to show him the way.

Huff for me is the center of it. I take the opening credits, that end with a pullback to show the back and side of his head, semi-literally: It's all inside him. But I care about almost all the characters and I'm invested in what happens to them both physically and emotionally. I love to see the way they reach out for, sometimes connect with but more often than not miss each other.

In fact, I'd say, the biggest problem with this ep was that the writing needs to get out of the characters' way. There was a little bit of what I'll call "Kevin Smith syndrome," where you're acutely aware of the writer stopping the forward flow of the action for a pithy phrase.

But I loved what Beth's mother told her husband the first time she saw him (I'm being spolier-free).

'Bout time you realised, You are a specialty; There is no one like you

You Are Teal Green

You are a one of a kind, original person. There's no one even close to being like you. Expressive and creative, you have a knack for making the impossible possible. While you are a bit offbeat, you don't scare people away with your quirks. Your warm personality nicely counteracts and strange habits you may have.

What Color Green Are You?

PS

On the other hand, this publisher seems much more promising. They have several books in the collection of my local library, books (and writers) that are sometimes also published by mainstream houses and get reviewed by journals like Publisher Weekly. The stories also sound like they have more potential.

I've just requested a handful of them from the library to see if they live up to that potential.

However, this final sentence from a PW review of one of their books (that will remain nameless) does return me to something like my earlier state of agitation:

Although the author, who completed this novel shortly before her 80th birthday, lacks the skills of romance heavies Steele and Krantz, her story will be appreciated for its pastoral atmosphere by readers who yearn for a fiery romantic yarn that accommodates an alternative lifestyle.

"Lacks the skills of romance heavies Steele and Krantz."

I'm just gonna go die now.

A quick rant on things I shouldn't do

I shouldn't take a look through the titles published by gay/lesbian publishers like this one. Why? Because not only do they seem to have no penetration into libraries (which is important to me-I somehow won't feel I've really written a book till it's in libraries), but-

...while far be it from me to judge books by their promotional blurbs...they all sound awful. Romance-novel awful. And it makes me think oh god, I know what's going to happen.

I used to worry my manuscript would fall between two poles; too gay for the "traditional" audience, not enough so for the gay audience. Now I think it's going to be: Too gay for the mainstream, too good for the gay & lesbian press.

(That's it, Ben. That's the kind of unwarranted arrogance that'll be sure to cushion the blow when the form-letter rejections start rolling in)

Oh, god...

There should be a category for "She's made you some kind of laughing stock, because you dance to disco and you don't like rock"

You Are a Glam Rocker!

You put the "show" in rock show with your larger than life self. No doubt, you are all about making good music... But what really gets you going is having an over the top show. Glitter, costumes, and wild hair are your thing - with some rock thrown in!

What Kind of Rocker Are You?

David Bowie: I once asked [John Lennon], "What do you think of what I do? What do you think of glam-rock?" He said [imitating Lennon], "Aww now, it's great you know, but it's just rock and roll with lipstick on."

I'd say this kind of information is worth a few sheckels, wouldn't you?

Gregg Berger, the voice actor whose credits include Garfield, Rugrats, Niles' cockatiel on Frasier and most importantly, my all-time favorite animated pig (sorry, Porky), Cornfed on Duckman, writes:

On Wednesday of this week, at two minutes and three seconds after 1:00 in the morning, the time and date will be 01:02:03 04/05/06. This won't ever happen again.

Via News From ME.

Now, If you look over to the right there and click the View my complete profile link you'll find, among other things, a link to my Amazon.com Wish List. If you're amazed at the quality of information passed on this site (I know I am), please consider making a small donation to the Buy Ben Those CDs And Books He Can't Score Through The Ink 19 Gig Fund. I thank you.

It's times like this I almost wish I were a a real Bill Maher fan

As a satirist, he's no Trudeau, but every once in a while he comes up with a great moment...like this one. Every time you see one of those Republican chickenhawks defending the incompetent way Bush has waged "the war on terror," you've got to ask them:

What would you being saying if this had been done by someone with the last name of Clinton?